Myopia

[GratefulFloyd]

Written today rather quickly.

Align your eyes where the flag doth fly,
Tunnel your sight as it may,
Harken your ears to no more than its cry,
Immortal, this glorious day.

Ramparts wave where blood is shed,
While missiles bring forth the dawn,
With reveillies to calm the dead,
And anthems to summon us on.

Green fatigues and steel-born arms,
No tears through the hell and dirt,
And so the patriot, unalarmed,
Does away with that towelhead flirt.

Kaiser, kaiser, a rise of his fist,
From the back he calls to the fore,
Attack! Attack!
Not a step taken back,
And the dominoes sink to the floor.

Rise and fall, rise and fall,
The waves that quickly run,
The views in the night shine not a shade,
And the blue rests itself in the sun.

Align your eyes where the flag doth fly,
Tunnel your sight as it may,
Harken away from the enemy's cries,
For he'll soon meet the last of his days.

[poopzilla33]

try messing with the syllable count in each line. it sounds like it wants to have a form. maybe eight sylables in one line and six in the next so on and so forth

[bbbeccaaa]

i usually don't much like rhyming poems but this one's excellent...great flow, nice message, and well written.

[VolcomStoner420]

Don't like rhyming poems?!!?!?!?!?! I hate poems that dont rhyme, its a fucking struggle to read them.

[bbbeccaaa]

^ just my preference.

[GratefulFloyd]

try messing with the syllable count in each line. it sounds like it wants to have a form. maybe eight sylables in one line and six in the next so on and so forthIts all fairly intentional. I don't like form, I like dissonance. Haikus aren't my thing.