HollyWeenY

[Jack Maundrell]

Pumpkins light up the cautious sky on hollows eve
while mad children roam the the vast city.
The color of death rains from the trees above.
Evil murks under shadows without love.
Parading covered masks hiding fear,
sugar laced calories consume our dear.
dogs howl under a full moon so bright
we give thanks to these night of nights

[mojave green]

A little greeting cardish, but so is the holiday. Eve and city don't ryhm. Try to rework these two lines for a better match.

[Jack Maundrell]

yea it kinda suck ohh well

[Malapascua]

I don't think it sucked Jack.
I didn't agree with "Evil murks under shadows without love."
And "these night of nights" would look better (to ma) as "this night of nights".

I think that if you wanted to tweek this it would be great.
I enjoyed the concept.