licidious vibrations emenating cloud

[TomDijon]

a building eclipsing the sun and sending rays visibly overtaking it's tip, a concrete floor, cracked and exposing the grip of life, what we call weeds, an entire strain of evolutionary proof; the giver with the gift of hope; the priest of gaian life; the midwife of life, it calls it hope; it calls it gift; it calls it a chance to live...

a tree standing tall on a mountain peak

the time is dusk

the moon is full;

the stars dwarfed by the reflection of the sun

it's reflection ripples and breaks on a lake;

a bird swoops swiftly; catches a stray fish

gone in the night

a poet sits and writes

pen flowing like ink, minds making me think

echoes of thoughts distilled and peaked; funneled and leaked, dripping into the lake of my mind's landscape

ripples and tides, trickle spittle on sides, breaching beaches of bides, brushing toes of my guides

a reflection

of my own minds eye

is it the sun or the moon or the stars or the sky

is it the sight of my life or just a joke, just a "guy,"

just a what? just a note; a reminder of I

where was I?

[~*Jen*~]

I really enjoyed this. The imagry was fantastic. But sometimes the flow was thrown off. It would be perfect if you work on the rythem a little. other than that i loved it. Keep writing so i have something worth reading.
:)
<3Jen

[Miss_Beatle]

Beautiful. That was really good!

[TomDijon]

thank you. and yeah, you're right, going over it i noticed it too, would definitely change a few things



where was I?

I think that I was trying to fly

coughing/choking/drowning on the what and the why

and it's gone;

blown like a leaf in the wind


-like a salmon upstream, my mind tilts and i swim



and my journey










begins


(I thought i would add the ending to this)

thank you!

Evan