happiness

[thereaperman44]

is it better to put everyone elses happiness above your own?

[Peace-Phoenix]

Not all the time, but certainly sometimes it is. It's certainly a positive to act selflessly and put yourself out for others. But I don't think one should do it to the point of destroying your own happiness. Sometimes you just have to come first. You can't be a good to anyone if you're not being good to yourself....

[phoenix_indigo]

it's a really tough balance i find. i tend more often than not to put everyone (including the cats) before myself ... but well then i'm left with not much for me. i think this may be why i get those weeks that i want to crawl into a hole for awhile. then again, even when i feel that way, i STILL put other people before me.

so to answer your question, yes, it's good to put other's happiness before yourself but sometimes it is bad if it does hinder your own personal wellbeing.

...which is basically what my fellow phoenix said and a lot more eloquently i might add. ;)

[thereaperman44]

im not making any one happi at the moment and my depression is stepping up a gear. fun times ahead

[jackson_uk]

Your thought of you not making people happy...you don't have to go to the ends of the earth to make someone happy...sure, you could do charity work, help out family members ect...but what makes me smile are the simple things. For example, if i'm feeling down and i'm paying for something at the till i'll say "Thanks, have a great day/weekend"...then just watch the smile on that persons face...really makes you feel great.

[Peace-Phoenix]

Welcome to the forums Jackson, hope you have a happy time here. :)

[jackson_uk]

Thank you, I'm already having a happy time :)

Have a Great Bank Holiday!! :)....see, i bet Peace-Phoenix is smiling now! hehe

[Peace-Phoenix]

:) ....

[thereaperman44]

i work for a charity, i do care work on sundays to do my bit. i do all the little things to remind me to smile. its just damn hard being in two places at once and not getting it right most of the time. i just wish i could be better

[jackson_uk]

If you have to remind yourself to smile then its not worth it as its not natural. It's like reminding yourself to cry...its forced and done for effect.
How do u mean when you say "its just damn hard being in two places at once and not getting it right most of the time."??
And don't worry, we all wish we could do better. Sometimes when you feel your a long way from the top, its worth turning around and seeing just how far you've come already.