Kill The Urges

[PaulWall'sGrills]

Aight, I'm 21 and I've thought I've should have been a girl since I was 5. I wanna stop this shit, I mean I don't wanna be a girl anymore. I can't shake this shit though. I hate what I've become, I can't even go about my daily business without having to think of myself as light in a prism, divided. I don't wanna be anything but a girl, but I hate the thought of being that weak and fragile. I'm a pretty fragile guy as is and I can't seem to make head way in the area of becoming masculine. I feel like I'm a girl and I'm trying to become a man with no luck. If anyone has any advice in breaking down the feminine side of myself, please share thanks.

One,

Paul

[Samhain]

2 things

1) don't try and run away from any side of yourself as it will always come back and bite you in the butt and usually at the worst possible time in your life
2) feminine doesn't equal weak
S

[Innocent Angel]

2 things

1) don't try and run away from any side of yourself as it will always come back and bite you in the butt and usually at the worst possible time in your life
2) feminine doesn't equal weak
SI completely agree with that. Ive never run away from who i am, or tried to "be a man", cos ultimately i know i can't force myself to be something i know i'll never be.

Ive seen enough people go down the route of having girlfriends, getting married, or trying to do the most macho professions around to try and 'fix' themselves, but it never works. Sooner or later they have to face reality, and admit who they really are. Im glad i never tried to deny that im truly female, cos id probably have done a lot of things id regret now if i had've.....

[Samhain]

Ive seen enough people go down the route of having girlfriends, getting married, or trying to do the most macho professions around to try and 'fix' themselves, but it never works. Sooner or later they have to face reality, and admit who they really are. Im glad i never tried to deny that im truly female, cos id probably have done a lot of things id regret if i had've.....
often its when a person has a family and has been married for years that they realise they can't do it any more and by this time it has a knock on effect on everyone
S

[mynameiskc]

i'm a female who's long hated the feminine side of me. by embracing both aspects of who i am, i'm becoming a more fulfilled and happier person. samhain kinda helped me out with that. but in our society, it's a lot easier to be a beautiful woman with sexuality issues than it is for someone in your position. it's going to be a rough road, but denying any part of yourself is a crime against yourself.

[lionman80]

Start taking whey protein and going to the gym. That is how most guys deal with it.

JK

[Samhain]

Start taking whey protein and going to the gym. That is how most guys deal with it.

JK
your speaking from the experince of someone who feels like they are actually a girl?
S

[mynameiskc]

he's saying all bodybuilders are secretly gay.

[Samhain]

he's saying all bodybuilders are secretly gay.
well tell us something we didn't already know
S

[mynameiskc]

dave was a bodybuilder.

[lionman80]

your speaking from the experince of someone who feels like they are actually a girl?
S


As long as you think its funny. That's all that counts. I am silly sometimes.

[Samhain]

As long as you think its funny. That's all that counts. I am silly sometimes.
that wasn't a joke, you are giving advice in the transexual forum, I was wishing to know where you stood with this
S

[lionman80]

that wasn't a joke, you are giving advice in the transexual forum, I was wishing to know where you stood with this
S

I think it is fucking nasty. That is my opinion.

[Samhain]

I think it is fucking nasty. That is my opinion.
just so long as we're clear I think its important that if your going to come in here and offer advice, to the transexual community, we know where you stand
S

[mynameiskc]

I think it is fucking nasty. That is my opinion.
i can't for the life of me figure why you would be here unless you are a: curious, b: in denial or c: trolling like a troglodyte. unless you truly have something valuable to add, and i doubt this, based on your previous post, i kindly ask you to leave and don't let anything catch you in your ass on the way out. however, should i be wrong, i apologize. it simply seems to me you SHOULD have better things to do with your time.

[Samhain]

i can't for the life of me figure why you would be here unless you are a: curious, b: in denial or c: trolling like a troglodyte. unless you truly have something valuable to add, and i doubt this, based on your previous post, i kindly ask you to leave and don't let anything catch you in your ass on the way out. however, should i be wrong, i apologize. it simply seems to me you SHOULD have better things to do with your time.
I think he responded like that because I asked him if he ever felt like he was a girl (resonable question in here) and one that I was serious about, but we both know what a knock to the male ego can do don't we
S

[Allonym]

i guess i dont really understand why you wouldnt want to acknowledge who you really are. being "weak and fragile" has nothign to do with feminity, but a whole lot to do with denying your true self, with hiding the bulk of who you are from everyone and even from yourself. if you cant find a way to be strong and confident in who you are, whoever that may be, of course you will see yourself as weak an dfragile - regardless of gender

[mynameiskc]

I think he responded like that because I asked him if he ever felt like he was a girl (resonable question in here) and one that I was serious about, but we both know what a knock to the male ego can do don't we
S
especially a fragile one full of conflict about his masculinity. a man okay with who he is, what his urges and drives are, wouldn't feel compelled to respond with knee-jerk cruelty. whatever his feelings truly are on the matter, there's just no point to become nasty in a thread for someone having a hard time figuring out who they are and what their place is in the world.

[BodyElectric]

He was probably a bored passer-by from the love and sex forum who didn't know that the one line quips, troll-age and general disregard for personal feelings that fill the rest of this site, doesn't cut it in here unless someone turns the flames on.

The Trans forum is one of the most positive on the Hip site to ask for advice. Cheers to it staying that way.

to the OP - Find yourself a therapist that is trans friendly. These people are right. Fighting yourself only damages yourself. The longer you are in denial, the more chance you have of hurting others when you finally get tired of the struggle. Now you may not want/need to come out right now, but you're going to need some help in coping with all the conflict, at the very least.

[Samhain]

He was probably a bored passer-by from the love and sex forum who didn't know that the one line quips, troll-age and general disregard for personal feelings that fill the rest of this site, doesn't cut it in here unless someone turns the flames on.

The Trans forum is one of the most positive on the Hip site to ask for advice. Cheers to it staying that way.

to the OP - Find yourself a therapist that is trans friendly. These people are right. Fighting yourself only damages yourself. The longer you are in denial, the more chance you have of hurting others when you finally get tired of the struggle. Now you may not want/need to come out right now, but you're going to need some help in coping with all the conflict, at the very least.
this is great advice thankyou
S

[Applespark]

Aight, I'm 21 and I've thought I've should have been a girl since I was 5. I wanna stop this shit, I mean I don't wanna be a girl anymore. I can't shake this shit though. I hate what I've become, I can't even go about my daily business without having to think of myself as light in a prism, divided. I don't wanna be anything but a girl, but I hate the thought of being that weak and fragile. I'm a pretty fragile guy as is and I can't seem to make head way in the area of becoming masculine. I feel like I'm a girl and I'm trying to become a man with no luck. If anyone has any advice in breaking down the feminine side of myself, please share thanks.

One,

Paul
theres a book called invisable partners that has an intresting view on the dualities of yourself. check it out

[shellygurl]

2 things

1) don't try and run away from any side of yourself as it will always come back and bite you in the butt and usually at the worst possible time in your life
2) feminine doesn't equal weak
S

I agree with you about runnin. Paul I wish I could tell you my friend that you can get rid of them there feelins but you can only hide em. Let me share a little of my story. I am now a 40 year old. I had them feelins when I was just a little en. Heck I remember wearin my mommas pantyhose at about 4 or 5 I remember dressin like a girl and when we wus playin I would always be on the girls side. Now don't get me wrong I had interest in girls too but something about them boys Uh la la. Sorry let me stick to the story. I became a football player to continue the masquerade but as a Junior I had to quit. I just couldn't do it so I joined the cooking class. I finished school and studied one year in Brasil fighting this thing. Came back, joined the Marines, eventually had to drop them for the woman who is now my wife. I do love her and all but when we make love, I sometimes have to imagine that I am in her spot and she or someone else is in mine. I hope this is acceptable but all through life when the issue of sex came up I always had trouble gettin it started when I was with a girl. I couldn't understand why. I became a truck driver cause I am a man. lol I am now a preacher in a certain church in Dallas, have been married for 20 years have 3 kids and 5 grandkids. My friend them there feelins don't go away. You can suppress them for a while but they just come back when you lest expect it and you will find yourself in a predicament like I now find myself in and not know what to do. I suggest you talk about your feelings and get em out there in the open, only then you will find out whether they are for real or it is just a phase that you are passing though. I believe however that it is something that will not pass. There are also professional therapists that may be able to help you, and once again I don't think they can get rid of the feelings but help you to accept them. If I can be more help please let me know.

Hugs and Kisses

Shelly

[TheMadcapSyd]

What's wrong with wanting to be a girl? Girls are just as awesome as men are, it's not being weak. Maybe in the very literal sense it's being weaker, but yes that's how it goes, we all know men have more muscles then women. But women are just as awesome as men are, honestly if you think you should be a girl, explore it before it's too late. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be female.

[Invisible Soul]

What's wrong with wanting to be a girl? Girls are just as awesome as men are, it's not being weak. Maybe in the very literal sense it's being weaker, but yes that's how it goes, we all know men have more muscles then women. But women are just as awesome as men are, honestly if you think you should be a girl, explore it before it's too late. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be female.

There's a big difference between "wanting to be a girl", and knowing you are a girl on the inside. I do wish id been born a normal, biological girl, but i always was female. Gender is a construct of the brain, not genitalia. Ive always felt female inside, so how can i "want to be female" when that's what ive always felt i am? I believe i was born like this, because its how ive always felt from a very young age. Being born in the wrong body is generally very misunderstood, and the fact even open minded people like yourself think people like me "want" to be the opposite sex just proves that. I just want to bring my body more in line with what my gender is. For people truly born with this condition, that's what it is. Changing your body to suit your gender, nothing to do with changing gender. My gender always was female. Im not saying there arent some men who "want" to be women, but that is not the same thing as being born in the wrong body, and feeling female from a young age. And lots of people also forget, or dont realise that males suffer from this too. (males trapped in women's bodies)

Inner strength is something that cannot be measured by gender. Physical strength, yes. But being how strong youre capable of being mentally, has nothing to do with gender. Weakness is not a female trait. And anyone who thinks it is, is measuring weakness in the wrong way.

[mysterydubai]

Don't kill the urges, become a female. I did! Magick always works ;)


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