questions concerning life (merged with) dazed and confused

[sickcharlie]

i feel like i am trapped in a womans body. i feel like everything i do is manly and the way i am is as well. the only thing that makes me seem like a girl is my boobs and no penis..i just want all the information about it without any judgement. example: when u get a sex change from female to male do u have feeling down there? how much is it? whats the recovery time? how to deal with social issues with it all..please help me again...dont be scared away

[amp7325]

Honestly, I have no idea what to say.

But a new Transexual/Transgender forum was created in the Personal section. Here's the link: http://www.hipforums.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=435

I hope that helps.

[erzebet1961]

Dont worry about scaring anyone away here, everyone on this forum feels for you, we dont judge, and we will do what we can to help !

peace to you

[Samhain]

Ok give me a bit of time, and I'll see if I can come up with a few answers for you, don't despair if you want to explore becoming a man there are resources out there for you, we just have to find them
S

[Samhain]

ok heres a link to some resources I have found in your area
http://www.tgguide.com/Guide/new-jersey.htm
the first part of the page looks like a dating service, but scroll half way down and you'll see a list of resources.

To be honest I advice that you go see your doctor asap, if this is the life path that is suited to you things like 'sex changes' are way down the road and you need to be set up with therapy all the way through, also if its anything like the UK you will have to live fully as a man for a period of time before you would even be considered for the opperation, so go to your doctor and see what the next steps are.

also have a read of this thread and see if you can relate to any of it, does any of it sound like it suits you?
http://hipforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=188579

I hope this has been useful for you and that you continue to visit us here, if you do start this way of life you may be able to give support to other people that come here in the future that are in your shoes now
S

[honeyhannah]

Good luck and feel free to post as much as you'd like, don't be ashamed, we are all here to support whatever decision come to. :)

Follow your heart.

[Samhain]

Good luck and feel free to post as much as you'd like, don't be ashamed, we are all here to support whatever decision come to. :)

Follow your heart.
lovely advice from a lovely person
S

[Bunbury]

Been there. I know exactly how it feels - you're definitely not alone. I'll see what I can find for you. :)

[erzebet1961]

Let us know how your doing !!

[Bunbury]

Sickcharlie: sorry it's taken me a few days to get back onto this. Too many other things competing for my attention! Hopefully we'll be able to find some useful information. Whe I left home at eighteen I knew I was trans, but had no idea what was available in terms of support. I also knew I wanted a sex-change (I bloody hate that expression!), but I didn't know what was involved (hormones, surgery, what, when, how, aaaargh). I found the internet absolutely invaluable. There's a wealth of useful stuff out there.

A good first port of call is an organisation called Mermaids, who are a support group for transsexual children and teenagers and their families. I don't know how old you are, but even though I was at the top end of the age range at the time, I found it very useful. I'd advise anyone to look at their website, no matter how old they are. It's here (http://www.mermaids.freeuk.com/). In addition, there are lots of links under the 'Media' section of that website - I've just had a quick look and loads more have appeared since I was last there.

Mermaids is a good place to start, and you can follow the links to other sites and know that the information you find is going to be sensible and worth having. I'm trying to remember the other sites I found useful, but it may take me a while as it's been a few years (and turbulent ones at that). :rolleyes:

I hope you find that one useful. Please keep returning to this board and let us know what you're up to. Or just talk about anything and nothing. :P I know how it feels to go through what you're going through - use the support that we can offer. :)

Peace,

Bunbury.

PS - Riff, in the poetry section, is me. :eek:

[Adamness]

Hey, sorry I don't have time for a thorough reply, but http://www.gender.org has info on everything from surgery to activism. It's generally my first site visited for anything trans-related. Also, I'm not sure where Bayonne is, but I'm in NYC. There's alot of trans groups around here, and if you have access to the city via PATH or car or anything, you should check them out. PM me if you want more info on them.

[sickcharlie]

hey everybody..its yer favorite person once again. i want to know how u all came to know this is right for u. i want to start a family and all but won't this fuck up my kids?....(me becoming a man) i am fixing to join the army in a few weeks..well the reserves and i know that i wont be able to accomplish what i want in this field but its gonna give me the start up capital to begin my family and my life long change. i am so in love with this girl and she says she'll accept me when i change but she wants to know all the answers first...can i get a hard on...do i have to pump it up?..can i feel it...all those questions and it is just taking me by surprise to have someone care about my side u know...no one else really does. i am feeling lost right now though i know my way if that makes sense. u guys on here have made me feel like i can be accepted for anything and everything i do so i was looking for some kind of answers..like a boost of confidence i guess. i dunno just any kind of help before i am pushed to far over the edge...much love and peace to everyone here

[Samhain]

hey everybody..its yer favorite person once again. i want to know how u all came to know this is right for u. i want to start a family and all but won't this fuck up my kids?....(me becoming a man) i am fixing to join the army in a few weeks..well the reserves and i know that i wont be able to accomplish what i want in this field but its gonna give me the start up capital to begin my family and my life long change. i am so in love with this girl and she says she'll accept me when i change but she wants to know all the answers first...can i get a hard on...do i have to pump it up?..can i feel it...all those questions and it is just taking me by surprise to have someone care about my side u know...no one else really does. i am feeling lost right now though i know my way if that makes sense. u guys on here have made me feel like i can be accepted for anything and everything i do so i was looking for some kind of answers..like a boost of confidence i guess. i dunno just any kind of help before i am pushed to far over the edge...much love and peace to everyone here
Hi
did you look at the other thread, you should find some help lines there, what you need to do is join a group of people that are transexuals then you can talk about these things with them, because every question you are asking now will have been asked before by someone else, and you need to go and see a doctor ASAP because nothing will start to happen until you have done, your doctors first point of call may well be putting you in touch with a charitable organsision or therapy then you can really work out what you want and need, however like I said go soon.

Now a lot of people join the army to start up capitol, when they get there they feel they have made a mistake, feel trapped and can't get out of it, so think carefully.
if you feel trapped in the wrong body you may also end up feeling trapped in the wrong enviroment too, not a good combination.
S
EDIT: so I'm not causing offense I don't feel that the army is wrong, however anything can be very hard if you don't do it for the right reasons

[sickcharlie]

alrighty then..thank u for the advice man

[Adamness]

Plenty of trans people raise children who turn out just fine. If you raise them in an open-minded environment,they will turn out open-minded.

The results of the ftm surgery vary wildly. Very few guys who get the surgery can have normal sex afterwards, and many transguys opt to onlyget top surgery and not bother with the sex reassignment surgery because the results are often considered "not worth it." Here's some more info and links on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_reassignment_surgery

[sickcharlie]

hey man i am a girl trying to be a man not vice versa..how is that different?...any advice..let me know

[Samhain]

hey man i am a girl trying to be a man not vice versa..how is that different?...any advice..let me know
the difference is the operation to become female is less (for want of a better word) complicated than the other way around, maybe someone can word this better but its easier to create female sex organs than it is male sex organs.
S

[sickcharlie]

so it is easier to make a man a woman than a woman a man

[Samhain]

so it is easier to make a man a woman than a woman a man
I tell you what I'll do I'll research it and let you know, maybe if any one else has more knowldge they could post on here in the meantime
S

[honeyhannah]

Gosh I saw a documentary once, I wish I could remember what was said. But yes, it's much more difficult to create a penis. On that note, I don't think I will try to say what I think, and be wrong, but think about all it takes to create a working penis...

As for raising a child, I definately don't think you would be endangering a child in anyway, why would you think that? It'd likely create a very open-minded, intelligent child, if you are honest and open and let him/her know that everyone doesn't have to be the same and it doesn't make them any better or worse than anyone else.

[Adamness]

so it is easier to make a man a woman than a woman a manYes and no. Physically, it's much easier to do the male-to-female surgery. Socially, it's much easier for a biological woman to pass as a man [with or without surgeries] than it is for abiological man to pass as a woman, in most cases.

[Samhain]

Yes and no. Physically, it's much easier to do the male-to-female surgery. Socially, it's much easier for a biological woman to pass as a man [with or without surgeries] than it is for abiological man to pass as a woman, in most cases.
Yes I couldn't agree more
S

[Samhain]

i have added a link to this thread which may cover some of your concerns about surgery, keep an eye on the thread, as I intend to add more in due course
S
http://hipforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=188579&page=3&pp=10

[Bunbury]

As the notable surgeon Dai Davies once said: "It's easier to poke a hole than to make a pole". :eek:

Crude, yes, but also true. :p FtoM surgery is more complicated and more expensive than its MtoF equivalents. Also, because the techniques haven't been around for as long, it tends to be a bit unreliable. That's why so many guys don't go for it. A lot of us would rather have the chest surgery and wait for the science and the surgical techniques to catch up before going for the rest. That's not to say that it never works, just that it doesn't always.

Look at the links from the Mermaids website that I posted in your other thread. You'll find useful things in some of those - I did.

A quick trawl just now has turned up this: http://www.ftmphallo.com/Home/ftmhome1.htm, which might be useful for you. Also, get yourself a Yahoo! ID and join the 'FTM Surgery Info' group - that's full of people who either have gone through or are going through one of the processes. It covers chest surgery and lower surgery.

[Samhain]

Hi
I don't know if your still around, but I've done this thread about surgery that you may find informative
http://hipforums.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2894491#post2894491