what the hell does this mean

[paperdoll075]

;;

[Mr X]

Hello!
Here's a curly one.
Can someone please explain what a guys motive would be (someone you are having an ongoing sexual experience with) in saying you are the only girl allowed near his bits? I mean, is he suggesting something else/trying to hint at something?

A few different ideas and opinions are what i'm looking for. A bit of everything.
ThanksCould you explain a bit more or in a different way?
I am not sure what excactly you are trying to say. I am guessing he is trying to say that you are his only sex partner.

[paperdoll075]

I am guessing he is trying to say that you are his only sex partner.yes, exactly....but i didn't think guys did that if all they were after was sex. i thought guys liked to keep their options open when it came to sex. he's basically saying he's going to pass up every other girl and only see me. i mean, that just sounds like weird behaviour for a guy only interested in sex?

[Charise]

Well, maybe he's not just interested in sex-maybe he's interested in YOU-isn't that what you want? That sounds like a perfectly normal thing for him to say if he really cares about you.

[paperdoll075]

yes...as much as i don't want to admit. that is what i want. and i'm being confused.by those sort of things that he has been saying.

[SapphireSerenity]

If you aren't already in a relationship I'd think he's trying to tell you he wants to be in one. Or um.. You're his only sex partner.

[RavenTheDarkAngel]

what's the situation? Were you guys having causal sex only? Agreed to keep emotions out of it? Was it said during the heat of passion?

If he said it during sex, just diregard it. He probbaly was trying to turn you on or something. But if he said it right after sex that might be just a compliment. If he said it any other time he might be trying to hint to you he wants something more than casual sex (if that's what you guys were doing). Question him on it and see what he says. That's the only way you truly will know anyway.

[paperdoll075]

okay, the situation is...it was organised as a casual sexual experience yeah. There was no mention of keeping emotions out of it. I just assumed.

The things i mentioned were said at other times. He also goes on about the less-sexual aspects to the sex we had. For example, how much he enjoyed just cuddling/spooning with me and being close to me.

[Mr X]

okay, the situation is...it was organised as a casual sexual experience yeah.

The things i mentioned were said at other times. He also goes on about the more romantic aspects to the sex we had. For example, how much he enjoyed just cuddling me and being close to me.Just to get an idea of the situation, what age range are you and your partner. You do not have to answer if you choose not to.

[paperdoll075]

sure thing, early 20's Mr. X

[Mr X]

Hmmn, I would have said if he was in his early to mid teens he is just a bit inexperienced with complementing ladies but usally in the 20's men tend to get better at it. Not to say he hasn't lead a sheltered life, quite possible in Kiwi.

Anyway don't stress about it, you are best of to talk to him about it. Not the big interragation but just a casual question like "what excactly do you mean by "Now you have me and only I am allowed near your bits" darling".
However the more I think about it, it is just the mating call of the Kiwi male usally to be found amongst sheep wearing gumboots and velcro gloves.
Sorry about that but I do know something about you eastern islanders and your mating habits.
Got a kiwi sheila in tow even as we speak. I went to NZ in 98 for a couple of months and found that a lot of the blokes are not real wordsmiths when it come sto the girls. "Hey you wanna fuck" is pretty romantic by our standards, so what your BF has said goes above and beyond the call of duty

[DarkLunacy]

I take offence to that statement madame... Saying that alls men want is sex is a sexist and vile statement.... Ok so what if its true in my case but still!
But to be of a serious nature and attempt to offer shoddy advice, I agree with MrX (Save the kiwi bit... WTF?) in that you need to talk to him openly about this. Because it sounds to me like you both want different things. Talking is the ultimate solution. Well actually the ocean is but thats neither here nor there. If you talk to him about what you want and he disagrees and you guys end up splitting, perhaps it was not meant to be?

[Mr X]

I take offence to that statement madame... Saying that alls men want is sex is a sexist and vile statement.... Ok so what if its true in my case but still!
But to be of a serious nature and attempt to offer shoddy advice, I agree with MrX (Save the kiwi bit... WTF?) in that you need to talk to him openly about this. Because it sounds to me like you both want different things. Talking is the ultimate solution. Well actually the ocean is but thats neither here nor there. If you talk to him about what you want and he disagrees and you guys end up splitting, perhaps it was not meant to be?I take it you have never been to NZ?
It's a running joke between the AUssies and Kiwis, both belief the other to be guilty of sheep shagging.
Anyway the more I think about it, it does sound like the bf is getting serious and although "You are a beautiful Woman and I want to spend the rest of my life with you" would have been more romantic, being told you are in possesion of his main love tools is not too bad.

[RavenTheDarkAngel]

okay, the situation is...it was organised as a casual sexual experience yeah. There was no mention of keeping emotions out of it. I just assumed.

The things i mentioned were said at other times. He also goes on about the less-sexual aspects to the sex we had. For example, how much he enjoyed just cuddling/spooning with me and being close to me.
Okay because he is mentioning how much he enjoys cuddling and stuff there probably is MUCH more than sex he wants from you. So I'd go ahead and go for it and talk to him if that's what you are looking for too. Best of luck to you guys. :D

[woodcat]

Sounds to me like he wants 'serious' relationship with you, its as simple as that. All you have to do is decide if thats what you want, if not tell him!

[christa]

it sounds like an odd thing to say without the context. i have a similar situation in which a few weeks ago the guy mumbled "I love you" i said it back (clearly) because its true and i've been trying to convince myself that our arrangement is workable. i mean, he didn't have to say that to get me into bed, we were cuddling up to go to sleep. the question is, is he the type of person who would say something like that for the hell of it, to play games...i dunno. i guess the only thing to do is talk about it.

[Fastswitch]

Hey Raven, if he said it just after sex, he really meant it! not maybe. How many guys out there are in a 'spooning' mood right after sex? If so, better men than me. Back to paperdoll, aren't you being a little rough on us guys, accepting stereotypical notions about all guys intentions? Isn't it possible that a guy can start an innocent relationship with a woman (casual sex), and find himself in love - without being hung out in a public forum, examined as to his intentions, and determined as genuine or phony by a bunch of strangers - even if anonimously? Or have you had really bad experiences before? I am amused at the 'my bits' routine! Colloquialism? "Now you have me,' prob. means what it sounds like. We're not too good at the 'I love you forever,' routine. Give 'im a break, please. BTW,the pix in your gallery indicate that he's a lucky man!

[paperdoll075]

*

[kissMeImPolish]

[QUOTE=paperdoll075]Yes. I fully accept that is possible. I didn't mean to be stereotypical about guys. I'm sorry if it appeared that way.

You should probably know, I am allready in a relationship. A doomed, awful relationship. He knows this.
My problem is, if he wants me for more then sex, why isn't he making it really apparent? Making me certain? He's not being 100% clear. Is it because i'm allready in a relationship and he won't step on that despite that fact it's doomed?

I just wish he'd be more clear about his intentions. He says things that as a woman, i take as being romantically suggestive. I automatically assume he wants more. Is this sex or is it a budding relationship? I don't know. Does he realise these things he says are going to make me fall for him or is he unaware?
I've never known a man segregrate himself to only one woman if he is only after sex. He's basically saying i'm the only girl he wants to have sex with. C'mom. I've never known a man do that when he's seeking FUN only.

This whole thing is basically. Does he want me only for sex, or is he after more. I'm not trying to stereotype guys at all. I just don't want to get hurt. Im screwed up enough.[/QUOTe
You're the only girl near my bits, means I trust you and care for u, and I have fun with you. Like others say it probably also means I like you!

Why wouldnt he be clear about this? Fear of rejection! But he dropped the hint, why dont you ask him what he means!

greg

[paperdoll075]

hehe i sound like such a nutter.

[denimstar]

I think maybe he's just feeling you out, seeing where you stand with a relationship other than sex. I'd wait and see if he says anything else after your next romp then bring it up.

[Texplayboy]

Maybe he had just watched the movie The Spy Who Shagged Me.

James