Emergency: I'm lonely as hell

[Rossy]

Crossposted: Don't care.

Why is it so hard to find one single person out there that just wants to tell you they love you and show you that they care? I grew up with a mother that was totally flipped off her fucking rocker and a father who for whatever reason didn't posess the capability to love and all I've been doing my entire life is searching for one person who could personally express to me that they actually care about me. All friends want to do is fucking get drunk or stoned and watch TV and when they tell you they love you it's just because they've forgotten that in this world loving people actually involves trying to make them happy and they're not ready to do the IMPOSSIBLE and hug another male. Seriously, I walk around in public with a fucking t-shirt that says, "I am lonely, please love me" every single day. Where the hell are the people that care? Why do people have all of this useless motivation to start useless communes that do absolutely nothing to change the emotional face of this world? I thought communal living was about love and happiness but all it's about now is religion or farming. Seriously, can you actually care about farming more than you care about being around people that love you. It's all about ideas, no one wants to give a shit and show you they care about you. Is there anyone that cares? Point me in their direction, please, for the love of god.

If you're someone that cares, tell me, I don't care if you live in a box in Antarctica, I'll move there.

[glitter star dust]

Crossposted: Don't care.

Why is it so hard to find one single person out there that just wants to tell you they love you and show you that they care? I grew up with a mother that was totally flipped off her fucking rocker and a father who for whatever reason didn't posess the capability to love and all I've been doing my entire life is searching for one person who could personally express to me that they actually care about me. All friends want to do is fucking get drunk or stoned and watch TV and when they tell you they love you it's just because they've forgotten that in this world loving people actually involves trying to make them happy and they're not ready to do the IMPOSSIBLE and hug another male. Seriously, I walk around in public with a fucking t-shirt that says, "I am lonely, please love me" every single day. Where the hell are the people that care? Why do people have all of this useless motivation to start useless communes that do absolutely nothing to change the emotional face of this world? I thought communal living was about love and happiness but all it's about now is religion or farming. Seriously, can you actually care about farming more than you care about being around people that love you. It's all about ideas, no one wants to give a shit and show you they care about you. Is there anyone that cares? Point me in their direction, please, for the love of god.

If you're someone that cares, tell me, I don't care if you live in a box in Antarctica, I'll move there.
that's rough dude.......... i am lonely sometimes too, but all i do is just ride it out, and try an get in touch with people i know, whether by calling them or writing an email or sending a text message or something, if i am not around anybody.
i guess i have learned so far that if you want people to love you, u have to show them love too. im not saying that you don't, and i definitely can udnerstand about friends who drink and smoke and watch tv all day, cuz almost all my friends are like that. but i think they do it because they are bored an they don't know of a 'better' way to live or anything. they probably love you they just show it in a different way.
but i definitley agree with you, being lonely really does suck, it has to be one of the worst things in life!!!!!!!!!!

[Rigamarole]

I understand. But nobody wants someone who is needy to attach themselves to them.

It's a paradox, but when you're most in need is when you have to be the strongest.

[Heironymous]

Hey Buddy, I'm not from a box in Antarctica, but I live in a small box in England.
( same thing really, it's freezing here!!)
Hey, can I do the uncool, allegedly un-masculine thing and give you a hug?

Everybody gets lonely, and feels that everyone else is just into their own shit.
Most of the time it is true. I asked my own big brother the other day to talk to me about his positive experiences in college. (I'm thinking of going and nervous about it)
Y'know what Rossy? He gives me a shrug and a one word answer.
Yeah, thanks big bruv. really cool. thank's for caring. I'm bricking it about a major shift in my life, and you can't summon up enough interest or compassion to relate.
AND THAT'S MY BROTHER.. Great, bruv. Thanks a bundle.`love you too.

Get a girlfriend, Rossy, and love, nurture and cherish each other.
A girl will probably stick by you and love you more than any of your 'mates' will.
Unless, like me, you're an awkward, spotty-assed teen, and no girl will touch you!!

You see, buddy, we all have problems. Things could be worse..You Could Be ME :-(

[purplesage]

I may be making a huge generalisation here but I find people to be so self-absorbed these days... right down to your own family. I agree with Heironymous, you can't always count on them to be there for you - which totally sucks.

Rossy, I'm not sure if you should wear that t-shirt anymore... you sound like a sweet young man to me, who has had a lot of grief in his life, and you have a lot to offer this self-centred world. I have absolutely no doubt you really do need these things very very much, but people may find it hard to deal with such an intense fact, straight away.

Keep hanging around here talking to us, I hope we can help you somehow. I know it's not exactly what you're after but it's a start.

[KyndVeggie4Peace]

You know what man ... Last night at work I was feeling really shitty, I almost started to cry. Why? I came to the painful realization that I lack some very fundamental personality traits ... one of them is passion, or compassion to be more exact. I love my friends, I love my family, I love everyone I meet ... But you know what? I wasn't being true ... I wasn't putting myself out on a limb for them. So you know what? *gives you a big ass hug* You mean the world to me. Truley ... you have just touched my life in such an amazing way, I don't think that you could understand. http://www.hipforums.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif keep your chin up bro ... there are plenty of kynd hearted warm pholks out there ... you can't waite and expect them to come to you, sometimes you have to go in search of them.

[twist1up4me]

sending great big hugs to you from portland, maine. dude, it truly sucks when you can't find the right person or people to love & have them show their love in return. i've been there. try being more nonchalant about your needs- people seem to congregate around those that don't seem to care one way or another what others think - and for gods sake get the hell out of the cape - massholes have no compassion whatsoever- i was born & raised in boston. if you are truly lonely PM me & me & my hippies up here will send love your way every day... hang on tight bro someone good, kind & loving is out there waiting for you. peace & love to all...

[*josai*]

i'm so sorry little brother....i hear your pain & i send big beautiful ((((hugs)))) your way!
in my past, i have found that when i was looking for love it was nowhere to be found. so ultimately i had to learn to love myself first BEFORE i was capable of sharing real love with others. when you are love & it emmanates from you, you will attract others who are full of love too. like kyndveggie said, when you breathe that compassion, others will breathe it back to you. so you just keep loving little brother, we already love you back. wish i was there & i'd give you hug myself
btw...the male not wanting to hug male thing is probably just a bit of immaturity from some rather compassion-lacking individuals. when i was eighteen, everyone i was around was stuck in a self-absorbed drug-induced haze. it won't always be like that forever though. people grow & change (we must evolve or we die). i became the change i wanted to see. & yes i lost the old friends, but i met knew ones who weren't afraid to drum & dance & sing & smile & most of all (((hug)))
the light is everywhere, within all of us, let yours shine & it will attract the others you're seeking
take care of yourself friend....we're sending *bright blessings* your way

[dilligaf]

very well said josai... :). thanks for doin all my typin for me... and rossy there is sooo much love out there,,, truly there is,,, tis just figuring out where it is you fit into all the love .... sounds stupid i know but we all have a place where there is loads of love,,, findin it aint the easiest at times,,,, but tis around,,,,
((((((((((((((((((((((huggggsss))))))))))))))))))) )))
luv n lite

[Sweet pea ky]

Hey brother, I'm sendin lots of hugs from ky. Just look around there is kind folks out there. I learned that when I was hitchhiking. I didn't think that I had anything but my pack, it was the world against me. But something happened, I met the kindest people. I traveled the US with the kindness out there. That gave me hope for humanity, there truely are kind people out there. Love is alive, sometimes its just hidden beneath the surface, just do some diggin.


Anyway I love ya bro, and I wish you the best of luck. XOXOXO:D

[rastapatch]

You can move in with me. Point blank.

We may fight, but then i will say i'm sorry, because i love you.

We have some strict guidlines in my house about conservation and recycling, because i love you. I will ask you to be constructive and work on the projects the rest of the co-op is working on, because i love you. I will give you an armload of my opinion, because i love you. We are one of those 'Lets buy a farm and make a commune' types, because i love you.

I think your shirt is deep, and beautiful. I think i know what you mean. I love you, and though i am a little slow to hug, i give GREAT handshakes and shoulder rubs.

As long as there is floor space you can have some. I live in a very conservative neighorhood, and we need to stand up straight in public, but i will not deny you.
Once i know you i can send you to any one of a dozen or more places. I am well known and have done this before.

You say this is a cross post. Have you ever been to a rainbow gathering.

namaste' #

[heyzeus]

sounds like you had a similar communal experience to mine. i lived at a commune for awhile and just kind of laid back while everyone argued...all the time, about everyfuckingthing. ha! everyone sought peace through argument...or something.
well, that was just the wrong place. there are right places...
and we'll find them.
i did, i found my girl, had a child and our 'little commune' is an island of us vs. the world. works fine for me.
hang in there. i would go into further detail about my own life, attempted suicides, questionable parents, but its all moot. love exists, sometimes its just hard to find.
sounds like rastapatch has given you a serious offer. thats love!

[Gyva02]

Well if I could I'd put a bunch of love in a little zip lock baggy and send it to you.... Make it to CO 2006 and I'll have a couple hugs for ya and maybe even a zoozoo or 2... :)


Mike...

[Domesticated]

It's great that someone had the balls to post this as you did, Rossy. I'm in the exact same situation, as well - lonely as fuck. It sucks so much that it is a social taboo to express such feelings, since having to repress it only makes it worse with time. I have to be a professional faker in every social situation because I know for a fact that I would meet intense hostility if I revealed my neediness.

I know there are tons of other desperately lonely people out there. I wish I could reach out to them, but I wonder if they all have to be professional fakers as well to avoid the rigors of social stigma.

[Lucky]

Hey brother,


First off : BIGGGG GIANT HUGS

No worries. I just came back home from the Ocala gathering... I didn't want to come home at all. I thought "if I can walk around and get told i am beautiful and loved by a million people a day, why go home?"
There are wonderful places and people out there.. And you know what- they are looking for you just as hard as you are looking for them. And if you are serious about a place to go, there are bunches of places. I'm headed to a pharm in oregon next week, i'm sure there's room for a brother like you. hit me up.

love and light

[Lenah26]

I've been there, and what's helped me is staying strong and true and kind. When the bad times and thoughts come I remember that is possible and very likely things be bright and beautiful again. Best Wishes, Loving You

[Lemongait]

Oh yes, I'm in just about the same place.
I think that everybody from the forums should move together into some kind of village in the trees or something, perhaps in the Redwood forest ('cause we'd so get away with it, haha :)).

[Radiohead]

seriously stop whining. you're an attention whore.

[Lying in a field]

Crossposted: Don't care.

Why is it so hard to find one single person out there that just wants to tell you they love you and show you that they care? I grew up with a mother that was totally flipped off her fucking rocker and a father who for whatever reason didn't posess the capability to love and all I've been doing my entire life is searching for one person who could personally express to me that they actually care about me. All friends want to do is fucking get drunk or stoned and watch TV and when they tell you they love you it's just because they've forgotten that in this world loving people actually involves trying to make them happy and they're not ready to do the IMPOSSIBLE and hug another male. Seriously, I walk around in public with a fucking t-shirt that says, "I am lonely, please love me" every single day. Where the hell are the people that care? Why do people have all of this useless motivation to start useless communes that do absolutely nothing to change the emotional face of this world? I thought communal living was about love and happiness but all it's about now is religion or farming. Seriously, can you actually care about farming more than you care about being around people that love you. It's all about ideas, no one wants to give a shit and show you they care about you. Is there anyone that cares? Point me in their direction, please, for the love of god.

If you're someone that cares, tell me, I don't care if you live in a box in Antarctica, I'll move there.
Lots of people care. You care. Maybe i'm a bastard but my instincts tell me to say...stop whining and do what you can.

[nudeinthesand]

i sometimes get like that too.....

[Bumble]

join the club! it's a lonely lonely world.

[rastapatch]

Gee, your cute

[Charise]

join the club! it's a lonely lonely world.
Boy, that's an understatement. I've been a member of this club for a long, long time.

[good_morning_vietnam]

I hate been lonely. It hurts ALOT inside. In time over the years I guess I have become accustomed to it and just try to be happy and peaceful now. One thing nobody should ever try (not to imply anything about anyone) is doing anything to yourself, trust me, doesn't help in the long run and just isn't good.

Rossy, if I ever meet you, give me/I give you a big FAT hug http://www.hipforums.com/forums/images/smilies/smile.gif I never get a hug off people either and any man who is incomfortable with hugging other men just isn't convinced about themselves.

Peace

[Flight From Ashiya]

I blame modern life for causing loneliness.
Everyone's obsession with money & materialism.We've forgotten how to be people in our stoic quest for storing up worldly goods & chattels.

[chime]

sorry, but i have to say that sending out an s.o.s. on a forum of like-minded people is not whining - that's reaching out when you need it. lovin you little brother.

i am so amazed at all the wonderful word-hugs sent your way! helping others is sometimes the best way to deal with our own problems. remember, we're all in this cosmic life-raft together and if we can give someone a hand up without tipping over this duct-taped leaky craft we call life we should be all about it.

[Charise]

I blame modern life for causing loneliness.
Everyone's obsession with money & materialism.We've forgotten how to be people in our stoic quest for storing up worldly goods & chattels.
Modern life has a lot to do with it. People used to sit on their front porches and talk to their neighbors as they walked by, or visit with them in the town square-now people are locked inside their homes sitting in front of computers or TV sets, and communicate either through the computer or phone. I was arguing with some folks a while back who said that people shouldn't watch TV or use computers, that it's not good for them. I said, well, what are they supposed to do, sit and look at the wall? They didn't really have an answer.

[peaceful]

In some places the contra dance and swing dance folk are friendly to lonely strangers. One does have to make a serious effort, appearance-wise, if you're reclusive. Here's the local Cape Cod info:
http://contrasene.tripod.com/contra/id8.html
Sorry about the tripod pop-ups.