Looking for someone

[xthevalkyriex]

I figured I'd try this forum out, and see if anyone has any visions/advice.

My uncle died in a plane crash when he was 19, in 1972 (I was born in 1981). A year before he died, his girlfriend gave birth to a son. They decided to give the baby up for adoption. For the last few years, my family has been trying to find my lost cousin, but have met with no success so far (his biological mother has said that she has no interest in finding him). We have used those find a relative search engines, but couldn't come up with anything. Our guess is that he doesn't have any interest in finding his biological relatives. However, we would really like to at least meet him and find out how his life has been. Our family is very tight, and I would love nothing more than to just just see my cousin once in my lifetime.

So, does anyone have an inkling about where he is, or how to find him? Or are we just wasting our time? Thanks for any thoughts you may have.

[day_tripper77]

im sorry to hear that his birth mother has no interest in finding him.. if i'd given a child up for adoption, i'd do nothing but wonder where he/she was, if they were happy...

i cant answer your question about where he may be, but i can sort of empathize.. my mom just told me last winter that when she was 16, she had a baby and had to give him up for adoption because her family didnt have enough money to be able to keep him.. and now that i know that i have an older brother out there (who was born around the same time that your cousin was, maybe a year before) i wonder about him all the time..

i havent really talked to my mom about it again, so i dont know if she wants to find him or whatever (im sure she does) but, i dont know how to go about finding him myself because i have no idea where to begin.. all i know is that she had a little boy, and she didnt get to hold him.. she said she wanted to, but she knew that it would only make it harder on herself...

so, in a way i kind of know what you're going through... if you want to talk about it, you can pm me..


good luck, i hope everything works out

[xthevalkyriex]

Your mom's name isn't Rayanne, is it? Heh..just kidding..that would be too freaky a coincidence. But I'm sorry that you're going through a similar experience, especially since it's your brother you're looking for. I never got to meet my uncle and I just feel sad that there's a part of him out there somewhere, that I could see him in the store or something and not even know who he is. And, I know my grandmother would like to see him before she passes on. The fact that he hasn't seemed to put forth any effort into finding his biological family makes me upset too, though I understand why he wouldn't. I just want him to know that his father died shortly after he was born, and that he was a big, loving (literally...that's my family's last name!) family that cares about him and just wants to meet him.

Thank you for your words, and I wish you the best of luck in finding your bother one day :)