What's a normal sex drive for a teen girl?

[HelloToYou]

FYI, when refering to "sex drive" in this thread, it is not the same as wanting to have sex... sex drive is the biological "need" to satisfy one's self sexually while "desire" is the biological "need" to satisfy one's sex drive by means of sexual intecourse.

Hey everybody. I'm just wondering what a normal sex drive and desire are for a teen girl (I'm 17.5 years old). I realize there is no such thing as "normal" when it comes to sex, but you know what I mean.... I don't really desire sex at all and my sex drive fluctuates with my menstural cycle. I have some sexual feelings around the time of my period, but I also have periods of total and complete lack of both sex drive and desire. Like, if my sexual desire matched my sex drive, I might want to have sex once a month. Maybe twice... maybe less than that. And when I feel my sex drive, it's kind of annoying....

No I am not on antidepressants and no I am not depressed, or on any other medications. It is not a medical issue, I am just wondering what other s think.

I have a boyfriend, but I never fantasize about him. I have fantisized before, but nothing too explicite except out of curiosity but probably nothing compared to other people. I love my boyfriend, but sex is out of the question. Even making out is something I have to be in the mood for before I even want to do it. When we do make out, I have somewhat sexual feelings, but they seem satisfied simply by pressing myself as close as possible to him.

I have blabbed on long enough, I hope this isn't too long for at least a few of you.

[express]

i would love to help you on your answer but im a male

[Weeble]

I wish I could help you. I'm female but I have such a strong desire to have sex that I often find myself fantasizing when I really should be doing something else.

[toolmaggot]

I dunno, mang. Sex is the main priority in my life.

Ahem.

[ihmurria]

some people just have a lower sex drive than others. A couple gals on here have husbands like that - maybe you need to try and find a mate who also has a low sex drive? In more extreme cases it can be called asexuality (little to no sex drive at all)

[Beyond-the-Clouds]

If you seen me then maby you'd have a better sex drive.

[makno]

average drive is 3 . 4 miles

[teh-horace]

is the .5 in your age really all that important to the question?

[El Hijo de Puta]

6 days a week

[HelloToYou]

is the .5 in your age really all that important to the question?
lol, no, not really. Nomally I would just say 17, but come on, it was like 2 or 3 in the morning whe I made the post.... odd things ae bound to happen.

[HelloToYou]

If you seen me then maby you'd have a better sex drive.
I know you are joking, but that's another thing; looks don't matter to me. I mean, I know they don't matter to a lot of people, but I don't seem to notice them as much as other people. Girls will talk about how hot someone is and I'll have to think about what that person looks like and then I'll agree that he's good looking, and of course it's all a matter of oppinion, so there are times where don't agree... The other day I was a bit surprized because I actually ran into about 2 or 3 guys that I noticed were attractive. It's just not something that's on my mind. My biggest crush ever was actually on a guy that was not all that good looking. I just really liked who he was and that's it!

[HelloToYou]

some people just have a lower sex drive than others. A couple gals on here have husbands like that - maybe you need to try and find a mate who also has a low sex drive? In more extreme cases it can be called asexuality (little to no sex drive at all)
Well, my boyfriend says that he is waiting until marriage, so I am safe in that regard and I do know about asexuality. As a matter of fact, I post quite frequently on the forums on the AVEN web site (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network). I don't know if I am completely asexual, but I am hyposexual at the very least.

[HelloToYou]

average drive is 3 . 4 miles
Ok, thanks, that clears things up ;).

[mrjsmith]

Well, my boyfriend says that he is waiting until marriage, so I am safe in that regard and I do know about asexuality. As a matter of fact, I post quite frequently on the forums on the AVEN web site (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network). I don't know if I am completely asexual, but I am hyposexual at the very least.Well, "normal" is a relative thing. People vary significantly in what they want. However, 2 people with very different levels can have problems. Friction, and not the fun kind. When you are kissing, you are satisfied. However, do you get the impression that he is satisfied? Does he think that you're really worked up and are just waiting for marriage? He might be thinking that. What if you 2 get married, and he's looking for sex daily? This should be cleared up before making any step like that.

If you're both about the same level of interest, then great. No problems. But you should establish that at some point.

[ZePpeLinA]

i guess sexual drive varies in every individual...sometimes i can be horny as hell and other times sex would be the last thing on my mind..i'm not longer a teen but i was pretty much the same when i was 17, 18.
besides, who's to say whats normal or not?

[RimmyDelicious]

I'm glad I don't have this problem.

[Beyond-the-Clouds]

Or here's an idea: if you don't want to have sex then don't.

[lovelightlisa]

I'm female but I have such a strong desire to have sex that I often find myself fantasizing when I really should be doing something else.

:D same here!

[HelloToYou]

Well, "normal" is a relative thing. People vary significantly in what they want. However, 2 people with very different levels can have problems. Friction, and not the fun kind. When you are kissing, you are satisfied. However, do you get the impression that he is satisfied? Does he think that you're really worked up and are just waiting for marriage? He might be thinking that. What if you 2 get married, and he's looking for sex daily? This should be cleared up before making any step like that.

If you're both about the same level of interest, then great. No problems. But you should establish that at some point. I know that normal is a relative thing, but it would be nice to know where I fall. Actually, when it comes to kissing, I am only somewhat satisfied, but I get the impression, that people tend to enjoy it more than I do, lol. I get the impression that he is satisfied when we are making out, but we don't do that often and I get the impression that he would like me to make out more often. What do you mean by "Does he think that you're really worked up"? He knows that I am waiting for marriage and that isn't a problem for him because he is doing the same, but I don't know what you mean by the "worked up" part. I don't even want to think about marriage until I am a bit older (at least a few years into my 20's), but how we each feel about sex would be something I would want smoothed out if we ever got to that point in our relationship.

[cbrmale]

Surprisingly, the average number of times married couples have sex seems to be around 2-3 times per week. It is likely that there will be times when one or the other in the relationship will not have an overwhelming drive to have sex each and every of those 2-3 times, but will have it anyway to make their partner happy.

For sure, some men have a lower drive, and some a higher. I'm a 3-4-5 times a week man myself. Anything less than three and I would have been well gone. My wife seems pretty much tuned to my frequency, she says she enjoys it around 3-4 times a week.

When you have actual sex, that the hormones associated with sex boost your desire. In other words, the more sex you have, the more sex you want.

Ultimately, if there is a severe mismatch in the sexual part of any relationship, it will be doomed to failure. But, until you get to the point of enjoying real and regular sex, it is impossible to know for certain how much you are going to desire sex.

And my conclusion to my posting. Waiting until marriage before sexual experimentation is as silly a thing as a person, or a couple, could possibly do. Beyond learning how much you are going to like and desire sex, good sex is a learned and practised art. Anyone can do have sex, but to do sex well, so well that you and your partner will be satisified for a lifetime together. That is an art.

[PaperCut]

is the .5 in your age really all that important to the question?
i was asking myself the same question. I read on hoping it would appear again somewhere in the post.

mmh:(

[HelloToYou]

Why is 2-3 times a week a surprising statistic?

Waiting isn't silly. It's indicating that the relationship is about more than sex.

[toolmaggot]

Your boyfriend's a chump.

[happy_kel]

mine goes between 50-75 mph. I do like it but i wont let myself fin for it

[WaitingForTheSun]

I've never heard of such a thing before. You just totally ruined my theory that women have more ravenous sex drives than men. What do you think about if you don't really think about sex??? Jeez, that would free up at least 6 hours of my day...

[april922]

When I was in high school, every day after school.. My b/f and I did something sexual... we were rabbits.

[sugarmaggie]

To tell you the truth, my sex drive didn't really kick in until I was about 25 years old. I mean, it was FUN to have sex when I was your age, but as far as needing it, no..that didn't come until later. I didn't even really know what sex was until I got older and knew my body better..felt more comfortable exploring. It was kind of awkward as a teen actually. I enjoy sex sooo so much more now. I think about it 95% of the time..:D . That's just me though...I guess it varies depending on the person.

[Alternative_Thinker]

Well, to GENERALIZE, puberty makes your sex drive seem (almost) unbearable... But it is said that the peak of the female sex drive is around mid-thirties. So the original poster seems pretty darn healthy, if you ask me.... AND, the way I see it, SM, I think your own journey to the peak has been quite a smooth process, too. ;)

Yes, the peak... The beautiful mountain of pleasure... The view from the top is not of this earth...

Of course, I can say that since the sexual peak for an average male is said to be around 18 years old, hehe. :p

[buttrfly)i(]

i love sex and i think about it a lot....

i only get to see my boyfriend once a month and the week before i know that i am going to see him it gets super bad,

oh yeah and that would be this week ,damn

[wolfie65]

From a male point of view, I have no sex drive at all. Just as well seeing that I've not had a girlfriend for 29 years (yes that did make me 12 at the time) and I don't plan on changing that statistic.

[chris_1661]

i love sex and i think about it a lot....

i only get to see my boyfriend once a month and the week before i know that i am going to see him it gets super bad,

oh yeah and that would be this week ,damn
Well if you never see your boyfriend, then if your sex drive is high, or if you are in that mood, feel free to give yourself some sexual pleasure by masturbating when he isn't around.

I masturbate like every night, unless I was really sad and upset, and not in the mood.

You can explore your body, and from what I have read about your sex drive in this post, it seems pretty normal and natural to me.

Just don't worry about it.

I wish I had proper sex with a girl, but because I don't, I have to make do with masturbation.

[Charise]

I wish I could help you. I'm female but I have such a strong desire to have sex that I often find myself fantasizing when I really should be doing something else.Exactly the same with me, and if this is about the sex drive of teenage girls, starting when I was about 12-13, my sex drive absolutely went through the roof. Everyday when I got home from school, my pants immediately came off so that I could masturbate for at least the next couple of hours. I had friends that were just the same way. I guess everybody's different.

[curious__]

From what I have read, it is normal for teenage girls to not have strong sexual drives. As being said here, this drive thing usually kicks in full force in your late 20s/early 30s, which is a bio signal to you that your window for making babies is gradually closing so you have to hurry. But as you mention your period you get more urges at some points of your cycle, that is also characteristic, prolly that signals your mid cycle ovulation peak time. At your age, I wouldn't worry. I would only encourage you to stay in touch with your body and definitely masturbate on and off to learn well how to orgasm and be receptive to stimualtion; perhaps that'll make your excitement heightened that you will need for marriage compatibility and satisfaction later on.