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11-03-2009, 10:03 PM   going to jail
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agoraphobic warrior
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going to jail
i fear going to jail because i can't seem to complete my community service hours. guess i could call my PO.. but i fear getting in trouble for something else..  the anxiety and migraines don't help at all. don't worry.. i'm not going to.. but sometimes i think just dying would be better. i realize i'm here for a reason, so killing myself would fuck that up.. but some nights i think i'm going to die because of the migraines. this pain is just ridiculous, i'd rather be in labor with no pain meds. rather smash my finger in the door.. something! anything!
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All times are GMT +1. The time now is 01:49 PM.
I only know what you tell us about yourself on the forums and generally I'm a bad advisor, so take this post with a grain of salt or two. But if I would be in your position I would try to stay busy with solving the problems. I would not expect to successes in medium time frames. Just don't stagnate. Small objectives can be reached anytime. Maybe I would look for a person I could trust. This person could help searching for a medical doctor and accompany my appointments. The person might give me confidence and hinders me running away from situations. Furthermore it is easy to throw out a barefooted lady, but it is not so easy to throw out two serious looking people.
Regards
Gyro
i'm still pushing forward... and i have to remeind myself all the time.. I met this goal for ME! even if it's not good enough for others.. it was and is good enough for me! i'm going to have to live with me forever.. not them...
I'm sorry to hear that. Two hours can be a long time and trustful persons are hard to come by.
Some years ago I grew into the habit of writing down tasks I have to perform. Usually I write down phone calls or appointments I have to make, like you do. But I also write down tasks I have to do in my job. For instance, if I have to build something I split this huge task into lots of smaller and easily manageable tasks. It is highly motivating for me to cross out task by task and to see the things slowly but steadily developing.
Regards
Gyro