I swear my mother is so ....I cant think of the right word, but she makes me so mad. She's been with this loser dude for almost 2 years now and he is very verbally abusive. He's an alcoholic, doesnt have a job and is planning on spending 6 months in jail for a thrid DUI offense. She keeps taking him back even though he hurts her. I live with them...unfortuanly which i'm so looking for a new place if this shit keeps up. I just thought it would be nice for my mom to have me be with her while he was away and I could help her out with the bills and stuff...He sleeps all day spends all her money at the bar. But after she's yelled at him for doing so she goes with him to the bar...grrr I'm so upset because i'm so upset about it and i've been tellin her i'd really like to spend sometime with her alone but she refuses because he will get jealous...WTF I"m her daughter. My grandma is expected to pass away within the next few days and she's off going to the bar with dumb ass. I'm so upset right now. THey just had a major fight and it's like even though i was stating my opinion my mom was still sticking up for him.. I"m very hurt...
if only i could get a girlfriend like that ......someone to extricate from sleezy bars !!....it would give my life purpose .
i feel for you about the verbal abuse and the jealously part.. about the rest.. i do still feel for you but maybe she sees something in him that you dont see? in any case, the first two things are not acceptable imho.
can you ask the cops to keep an eye on him? That way, next time he's messed up with the law, he gets his ass tossed in jail and is at least out of your lives for a while.
_________________________________ She's hurting, doesn't no how to pick decent men and doesn't have anyone that she can talk to that doesn't want to judge her behavior. I wrote a post about women like this and the need for some kind of help. It's scary how these women live but they don't how to live another way. It's easy to rant, taunt and judge but try helping her. People like that tough love crap but when you never learned how to love then tough love just sounds like judging and accusing. You both know he's no good and you are probally wondering why she just doesn't leave him. Ask yourself this, who will be there for her when he's gone? You will want your own life and she'll be in an empty house looking at an empty bed and feeling depressed. What's worse is that she's a drinker and that never helps a situation. You'll have to have a little more love and understanding and a lot less hostility and resentment because it won't make her change or you happy. Some people hit rock bottom while they're standing on their own two feet.
