Swipe Left!

For those unfamiliar with the Tinder dating app, when one "swipes left" on another user's picture, it means you are uninterested in that person and their profile is obliterated from your sight. When you "swipe right" , it communicates a match and a message of your approval is sent to the other user. Tinder, as far as I am aware, simply uses user images for approval or disapproval. I've never used Tinder, however I have used OKCupid which now also uses the same concept. At first I found the idea itself a bit distasteful, but eventually I warmed up to the "swiping" itself, not so much online dating, after a few accidental swipes. The experience has taught me a couple of things about myself.

Question: For those who have used similar dating site features, what usually makes you "swipe left"(disapprove) a profile simply based on their profile pics?

For me:

- when 75% of their profile pics being of them at a night club holding up drinks
- cleavage shots
- 5 girls in their profile and you have no clue which one they are
- they look like they are hiding
- weird angle shots
- resting bitch face

 

i've never used the app, but i have used okcupid on my computer before. basically, it was based simply on whether or not she was physically attractive to me. then, once i determine that she is, in fact, good to look at, i actually go in and read her profile and try to determine whether or not she is awful.

i do agree about the picture where there's multiple girls and no identifier of whose profile it is. i always have to assume that she's the least attractive one in the picture.

another turn off is when every picture has a duck face.

there's a greater variety of red flags on the written portion of the profile. starting with a complete lack of a written profile. or, horrible spelling or ghetto speak. or the ones that start with a small novel on who is not allowed to message them. or when the only thing they talk about is their kid; i'm not against dating a mom but that can't be your entire personality.

these aren't necessarily turn offs, but have you noticed that every girl in the world is "family oriented" and that none of them can live without chapstick?

 

Ah, you reminded me of some I was originally going to include in my OP:

- Too much makeup, or it looks like she put a lot of work into it. All this translates for a guy is "I'm going to have to wait 6 hours for her to get ready every time we go out"
- Duck face or the same "cute" face expression in every pic.

For the profile for me as well:
- Kids and bad grammer grammar.

 

They look over 40 years old, or over 50Kg in weight.
(Not that I would ever use a dating app, last week in Barretto I was beating them off with a shitty stick)

 

I don't have much experience with online dating, but what's not to like about cleavage shots?

 

She's in her bikini and there happens to be cleavage = hot

When it looks like she simply wanted to take a pic of her cleavage for the sake of cleavage = desperate, easy

 

Back in my day, when we wanted to talk to someone we found attractive, we just marched on over and said hello.

Tinder. Pah.

 

You forget, these guys never go out ......
Living in mom's basement + internet = not meeting women (or anyone else for that matter)

 

any date site I join, Im usually laid in less than a week.. chubbies need fucked too.

 

Actually that used the be the stigma. Today, 1.5 in 10 adults ages 18-26 use online dating, and growing.

The statistics for the Tinder app alone: an estimated 50 million people use the app every month (2014).

 

Dating sites are one thing but tinder and that other one, snapchat I dunno man, like I'm not even signed up, don't even know what the outlook is, never been interested in trying but I know some friends use it and they are like hey check this one out, check her out and on and on, just like... seems like a good site if you need some attention.

I like online dating though, I've some friends that have come through this really well, other ends of the countries and been together for 10+ years. I really do think online can and does work, but back in the day again see we didn't have all the cameras. You needed to get to know somebody for who they were, or tried to be. Now with photos you can pick and choose at the physical aspect first. God knows how many decent guys and girls are flicked away because they weren't attractive to the other person.

Man. That must blow hard and hurt. I've said it before, I say it again ... you could be the 10/10 bombshell but if you're a shitty person, then you're only like 4-5/10 for me while someone I find to be a 3/10 could jump to 8-9/10 if they're an awesome person. Which you aren't going to get from Tinder because they want you to pick based on looks first. The same users probably sit back and argue at the social standards, construct and appeals of women... but if you're using these apps, you're apart of the problem.

 

I'm not into online dating sites.
But if I were, short and fat/overweight/chubby men would be a huge no no.

 

Swiping left would initially be based on superficial points wether it is based on her pics or her basic profile info. Superficial reasons are ususally regarded as unimportant but they are not. If a person is seriously not attracted to lets say short hair or overweight people why not give in to that when selecting a suitable dating partner.

I'm one of those persons who looks at both pics and info and would not dare to say someone with a attention whoring cleavage pic or a duckface selfie is a definite no no. They're not my preferences btw, it is just if the info about herself or some lines are really intriguing, a bad profile pic (but in which you can see she's not unattractive) is just seen as a bad or unfortunate pic. And I've come to that point where I can even appreciate a woman going wild with like make up in a way I would not prefer to see every day. Lots of pics of her fav hobby or pastime that is not mine? Not necessarily a dealbreaker at all. So yeah, making such a list is really hard for me because it depends on the details with me. I would have to resort to plain simple things like not very overweight too. I admit that's almost always a no for me as well.

 

I agree that they are superficial preferences, but they are necessary . I don't agree with going with someone you find unattractive, your eyes will always wander and a breakup is more likely. I believe there are bad/unfortunate pics, or simply who people who don't know how to take pics, or simply have different views on what makes a good pic.

Same, as long as she has some things she is passionate about, I don't care! In fact, her being interested in something I don't understand would be nice as there is something new I can learn about.

I didn't have a list until I experimented with the match system. Some things you learn about yourself when you've swiped a couple of times.

 

Many women on dating sites misrepresent themselves, including their appearance. The ones who are genuinely attractive and in shape are mostly just looking for attention and flattery. Not all, mind you, but quite a few. If not, they are looking for a guy that they're generally not going to find on a dating website. Overall, dating websites are a waste of time. When reading women's dating profiles, the majority of them come across as vapid and not of any interest to me on an intellectual level. If you've seen one dating profile, you seen literally hundreds. Same types of pictures, same likes and dislikes, etc. I've met several women via dating websites, and any relationship I may have had with them was very shortlived.

 

I agree, but what I find interesting about this app is not how efficient it is at connecting the right people. What I find interesting is the reality of these connections, the psychology behind it, how people given the choice of selecting a partner will behave in an artificial setting such as this. I think of it as an experiment.

Another thing I find interesting about Tinder-like apps is that how they evolved from older "sophisticated" applications, which offered you the option of filling out long profiles in order to find the "ideal" match. It turned out, by admission of the owners of those very dating sites, that this didn't work too well. On the official OKCupid site, a site which allows one to write long profiles, on their advice page the first thing it tells you is that over 90% of the time people simply don't read and don't care about your profile text. This was written before Tinder came into existence. What does that tell developers? It indicates an new market, a new type of application was sorely desired by the majority of daters.

 

Another thing I wanted to point out about this sentiment. There was a point in time when the same exact thing was said about social media. That it was a "nerd"/"underground" thing for "losers". And I remember the exact people within my circle who used to say this. Today, those exact same people are the ones who can't get their little eyes away from their cellphone screens, checking their "FaceBook" likes/statuses and Twitter reply.

Here is mostly older people's relationship trajectory with this whole internet experience:

Confusion ---> Repulsion ---> Bashing ---> Acceptance ---> Obsession

 

I thought tinder was just for bonin', not for actually finding a relationship

 

It is used more for that, but far from only used in that way. Not primarily ment for one night stands either. It is just the best thing for that purpose (better than dating sites). For example because it looks at who's actually in your area at the time you're looking. Like Grindr.

 

Those are usually the porn fanatics. The guys on dating sites/apps are generally one step further Well the ones who are really on there with the intention to get a date. Not the profiles made by a desperate family member