Am I Depressed?

Hello! I have been struggling with what I think is depression for a while. I'm 23, and ever since I was 19, I have struggled with concentration and thinking. My psyciatrist put me on Ativan, Paxil, and Abilify. I feel so lethargic all the time. I literally sleep my life away. When it comes to doing things, I feel unmotivated and not focused enough to participate in it. Even in social gatherings, I have no desire to "do" things. I just sit or sleep. I don't think it is that I just don't want to do it... I think it's something to do with depression or anxiety (which I've struggled with since puberty). I haven't always had this problem though. I used to love to read books, watch TV shows, draw and color. It's just suddenly, I don't want to do things anymore. I WANT to read and draw and watch things, but I just don't feel up to it. It requires attention and concentration and thinking, and I just don't feel up to that. What should I do to combat this? How can I train myself to not feel so lethargic, and actually stay awake to do things that I actually, deep-down DO want to do. (like reading, drawing, coloring, watching movies, ect.) Please help me. I want my interests and my life back! Thank you so much.

 

Sounds like you are experiencing some symptoms of depression, such as loss of interest in things you once enjoyed, lethargy, lack of concentration, etc. Did your psychiatrist prescribe you all of those medications at once? That seems like a lot of medication, which could also be causing side effects that are contributing to the way you feel. If you trust your dr, and/or think the meds were helping, you should go back and talk to him. Maybe you need a change?

I try to avoid medication, but it definitely has it's uses. I would also recommend changes in diet or exercise habits, which help me immensely (you can probably get some good info via Google "depression and diet/exercise" or something).

 

Eww.. I think they have you on the wrong meds. Tell your psychiatrist that you want to be treated more for depression and see what he/she says. That would be my advice anyway.

Additionally, I find that having a job is helpful and also exercise is helpful.

 

Did your psychiatrist put you on all of that just to deal with lack of concentraton? If that's the case I would find a new psychiatrist who doesn't just prescribe pills like they are candy to start.

 

Sorry to hear this is happening.

You may want to check out the first post in this thread

http://www.hipforums.com/forum/topic/458019-treating-depression-and-anxiety/

Agree with yfm about this.

It's hard to know exactly what's going on. It could be that the medications you were given are helping, but have side effects. It could also be that you were put on too many meds, or the wrong meds.

If your psychiatrist just loaded you up with meds, then did little or no follow up, then your psychiatrist sucks and you should probably try to find a new one (it could be that your psychiatrist put a little more thought into this, but we can't tell that from the post).

You may want to have a conversation with your current (or a new) psychiatrist. Unless you are suicidal or in danger of becoming suicidal, it might be worthwhile to try gradually reducing your medications and try other methods of treatment. If you go this route, reduction in meds should be done in consultation with your psychiatrist, since going off of meds suddenly can be dangerous.

It could be that some form of medication is the best, or part of the best solution for you. I recommend looking into other ways to treat your depression, and if that doesn't work, going back to medication using the lowest number and dosage of medications that is effective.

You should be eligible for vocational rehabilitation services in your state. They can help you find a kind of employment that itself can help you treat depression (e.g., you love horses or children, they could find you something related, or just a job with low stress), in addition to giving you income. Just getting out and being active in some way can be helpful, and employment, or a change in employment, can be helpful.

More than anything, getting to the root of why you are depressed, and fixing it, may be the most productive approach, but that can be hard to do.

Hope that things can get better soon!

 

I gotta agree with the prescription comments here. Something is wrong with the med school you are getting. If it was me I would stop taking them unless there is a noticeable upgrade to your mood.
Being that it isn't me I would question my doc. about the reason for each pill and tell him pretty much what you told us.

 

Have you been on these meds since you we're 19? Tell your doctor they aren't working. Or find a new doctor.

 

Why do people just automatically trust their psychiatrist?

He he/she actually a psychiatrist? as opposed to a pyschologist, why would you be seeing the former

Basically, if you were born in a third world country, you had to walk a couple miles everyday for fresh water, work the fields all day to have stuff to eat, you wouldnt have time to sit around and be bored

 

Ehh, VG's kind of harsh and a meanie, but I get it.

Years ago I had problems and I was seeing someone for a short while.
At first individually, and then she (the doctor) asked me to join her group thing.
We were just a weird bunch of random people, me a young person, an elementary school teacher, a failed writer lady who tried to kill herself twice when she was young, and another girl my age who claimed she was seeing and sleeping with all these footballl players who'd buy her gifts (I think she wasmaking it all up though). Oh and there was this lovely housewife who was into bioenergy and reiki and all that shit (her main problem was her hopeless financial situation though). It was just a once a week thing. And then another man joined the group. He was a soldier who went through war. After that, I looked at all of us and it seemed pointless. There was this man with such real problems and issues, and most of us were just kind of bleh. I stopped going.
The whole experience was a bit weird anyways. The doctor was trying really hard to find problems in my family, childhood and especially mother. Her questions and train of thought were very obvious. But I had a lovely childhood and my mother is a saint. I'm just the way I am, and I was always sort of sad(der), even as a child. Actually, especially as a child. I just deal with my moods, and I feel fine. Some people feel happy all the time, and some rarely. Me, I am perfectly content. I think some people are just more sensitive to, and aware of sadness and pointlessness. I often think of one thing my grandfather told me, and now I know what he thought, and that we were alike. Some people are just wired that way, I guess?
And now I am just starting to ramble, like some members here.

I do hope you find what works for you, and gain some control of your emotions (so they don't rule over you so much).

 

Ok, that's the best post I've ever seen you do.

Exactly. Compared to some of these guys coming back from Iraq, or kids growing up in Syria right now. None of us first worldwide have real problems.

Doesn't mean we have problems that can't be addressed, but people like the writer lady, you have to be a bit different in the first place to be successful at that anyway

People are what they just are, nothing really changes that.

And as if the psychiatrist isn't sitting there mostly concerned with how he/she is going to pay off her mortgage

 

I don't trust the medications. In middle school I was supposed to take them and I'd hide them in my cheek and spit them out.

It's hard to relate because everyone is going through something completely different. Most the time I feel depressed but don't show it because nobody listens or relates. I just kind of play the game, take it day by day, no real goals, and do what I figured I was supposed to do, and say my lines. Change everything your doing in your life. Throw away old memories, move, look for better people to be around. If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got. Get comfortable with change.

 

yeah, if i was born in a third world country i would have killed myself a long time ago. now i made it all the way up to my fourties so far.

 

That's a strange thing to say.

Why don't all third worlders off themselves then?

Are most of them actually happier than us?

 

I can

I can't speak for anyone else. When you say "us" I say no. I am only speaking for myself and I have no mouse in my pocket.

 

No. Maybe we should be more grateful for what we have, and appreciate that however bad things are, they could be worse. That doesn't mean that people in the first world don't have real problems.

What researchers say is that if you have your basic material needs met, good health, good relationships, and something to do with your time, you'll be happy. Certainly not having the basics of food, shelter, etc, would suck. And having more money than to just cover basics might make things a little better up to a point, but material things don't really matter that much once you get past the basics.

There are probably quite a few war veterans and people in the third world who are happier than either of us are, or even most people in the "first world".

The OP might feel a little better if she thinks, "Wow, I'm not getting shot at or having bombs dropped on my ass right now!". Thinking about what you've got to be grateful for and not taking anything for granted in general can probably make you a lot happier.

She's still probably not going start doing cartwheels and stop being lethargic.

People who dismiss "first world problems" mostly use it as an excuse to not have any sympathy for other people.

The OP has a real problem that may get slightly better if she is grateful for what she's got.

 

I've been suffering from depression for all of my adult life and before. I simply cope with it and opt not to use medicines or see a quack shrink. I'd rather feel real emotions despite the pain rather than artificial, pharmaceutically induced ones. To each their own.

 

That second part though, I don't think there is any medication in existance that isn't going to have side effects, more serious side effects down the track. Medication that plays around with brain chemistry that is.

Anti depressant meds at 20 or 30, no Medico is going to have any idea whether that will actually make things better or worse. 30 years later.

The discussion in another thread about the jump in aged related female suicides over the last couple decades. I think it's mostly about these meds.

 

It's nice that your depression isn't severe enough to require medication. I hope your having fun up there on your high fucking horse.

 

You don't know that

 

True. It would explain a lot.