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I'm Frustrated.....




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#1 Ashalicious

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Posted April 30 2016 - 12:36 PM

This has been an ongoing issue for about two years now. Our neighbor (I won't say where he is from, because I don't want this to turn into a racial issue) has a serious problem with taking care of himself. He stinks. He stinks like spicy, rotten Indian food (no, he is not from India.)This is most likely due to him not showering on a regular basis, and not washing his clothes or bedding on a regular basis. He probably doesn't even clean his place much. I've never seen him take garbage out.

 

Last summer, it got to the point where if I was entering the building at the same time as him, I would take the stairs up 9 floors, so I wouldn't have to ride the elevator with him. He is just so fucking stinky, it makes me sick. Especially in the summer, when it gets stinkin (no pun intended) hot here.

 

Mostly we smell him in the hallway. The hallway fucking reeks. It is like the stinkiest cab you have ever been in, X 1000. I think this may be partially a culture issue, because he comes from a culture where parents don't teach their children basic life skills, like how to do laundry and take care of yourself on a regular basis.

 

Anyway, I have a pretty sensitive smell, and have been able to smell him on and off in our bedroom. My husband never did notice the smell in our bedroom, until a few months ago, when it started to get really bad. The way the apartments are laid out, our unit and his unit are on the front of the building, and there is only a wall separating our bedrooms, and the smell has started seeping through.

 

Another part of the problem - the neighbor is a really nice guy. He is very friendly and kind, and I enjoy chatting with him when he doesn't stink. Because he is so kind, this makes the problem an extra sensitive issue, because the last thing I would want is for his feelings to get hurt.

My husband and I talked to the landlord a few weeks ago, and advised him of the situation. We made it very clear that we didn't want the neighbors feelings to get hurt, but that something needed to be done. The landlord said he'd look into it, but I am assuming he never did, because the hallway is still stinking. (Fortunately, I haven't been able to smell him in the bedroom in quite sometime. This could be because I have been very adamant about keeping the windows open wide to ensure good airflow).

 

Fast forward to this week. The smell is again very very bad. My husband and I got home from the gym on Monday night and the hallway was fucking wretchedly smelly. I decided then and there that I HAD to take matters into my own hands and write the neighbor a note. Summer is coming, and this problem is only going to get worse.

 

I proceeded to write the neighbor a VERY kind note. I don't remember exactly what it said, but it more or less went something like this:

 

"Please know that this note is written and sent from the utmost kindest place, and is not meant to be hurtful. There has been a very strong and fowl odor coming from your apartment, and it is recommended that to prevent this from happening and to prevent embarrassment on your part, showering and washing your clothes/sheets on a regular basis, as well as airing out your place often, is necessary. Again, this note is coming from a place of kindness and concern, and is in no way meant to be hurtful or mean"

 

I folded the note and taped it to his door, and after that, THE SMELL WENT AWAY FOR SEVERAL DAYS. It was only LAST NIGHT that is started to come back, and today the hallway stinks like it always fucking does.

 

I should note that we did see him coming out of the elevator while we were going on, and he was PISSED. I was kind of hoping he would have asked me if I knew anything about the note, because I would have told him that I had been the one to write it, and I could have then talked to him in person about the problem.

 

In any event, I am FRUSTRATED. I am so sick of this being an issue. WHY CAN'T PEOPLE JUST FUCKING WASH AND CLEAN THEMSELVES? IS IT THAT FUCKING HARD? SHOULDN'T IT BE THE LANDLORDS RESPONSIBILITY TO DEAL WITH THIS? DON'T WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO LIVE IN A STINK FREE ENVIRONMENT?

 

I also wish I had the balls to go next door and speak with him myself, but I don't think I do.

 

So tell me, how would YOU deal with this issue?

 

 

 


Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

#2 bry75

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Posted April 30 2016 - 01:22 PM

I would just be straight up with in person and tell him whats on your mind in the kindness way of course.



#3 Spaceman Spiff

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Posted April 30 2016 - 04:26 PM

move

 

buy your own house...problem solved



#4 Ashalicious

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Posted April 30 2016 - 04:46 PM

move

 

buy your own house...problem solved

 

Move? No.

 

It is pretty hard to want to move when your front yard is the fucking ocean.


Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

#5 quark

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Posted April 30 2016 - 04:55 PM

My hopes and dreams may still come true... Anything is possible if such a smelly man can obtain oceanfront property.

 

*halts cleansing oneself, mid-shower*


Edited by quark, April 30 2016 - 04:57 PM.

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#6 Ashalicious

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Posted April 30 2016 - 04:55 PM



move

 

buy your own house...problem solved

 

734ZfWR.jpg

 

I did this out of love, fyi....... ;)


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Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

#7 Spaceman Spiff

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Posted April 30 2016 - 05:08 PM

i dont care..the ocean is disgusting id take my fresh water lakes and forests any day over chinatown bc with fukushima water beaches



#8 Mattekat

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Posted April 30 2016 - 05:14 PM

I don't have any good advice in this situation :( writing a note is exactly what I would have done. It is how I dealt with the only neighbours I ever had a problem with actually. Maybe try talking to the landlord one more time?

And yeah, NEVER MOVE!!! OK maybe not never but your balcony is the best thing ever!
"Life is change. Have some fun."

#9 orison

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Posted April 30 2016 - 05:29 PM

prank call 911 dead body in apartment... 


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gallery_104050_1936_34168.jpg
 

Into the flood again
Same old trip it was back then
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Try to see it once my way


#10 Vanilla Gorilla

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Posted April 30 2016 - 07:13 PM

734ZfWR.jpg
 
I did this out of love, fyi....... ;)



Major Lolz

#11 hotwater

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Posted April 30 2016 - 07:38 PM

You can always fight fire with fire and see how he responds 

 

 

 

gro_lysol_spry_lin_z.jpg?lastModify=2012

 

 

 

 

Hotwater


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Never! This is outrageous. I'm through with it. I'll have no more of this hell-spawn!

#12 neonspectraltoast

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Posted April 30 2016 - 07:40 PM

Just start hanging one of those car air fresheners from his doorknob every day.  He will be too lazy to throw them away and will just discard them in his apartment, which will either freshen up the place or make the smell that much more unbearable.


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#13 lode

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Posted April 30 2016 - 08:28 PM

The only culture I can think of where proper hygiene isn't pressed upon the young are hippies and Trekkies. If your neighbor isn't one of those groups I suggest you travel more.

 

You know the solution to the problem. Offer the stinky gentleman a life makeover. Option two is move, and option three is be miserable. If you want, bring along a camera and say you're shooting a reality show. 


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I can't fit the phrase 'Snoopys Penis Rules' into every post.


#14 Ashalicious

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Posted May 01 2016 - 12:28 AM

i dont care..the ocean is disgusting id take my fresh water lakes and forests any day over chinatown bc with fukushima water beaches

 

Relax.


Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

#15 Meliai

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Posted May 01 2016 - 06:23 AM

He might have some mental illness issues going on, or maybe he has some sort of drug/alcohol problem. I agree with lode, i dont think being a disgusting slob is inherent in any culture. A lot of cultures dont bother with deodorant but this sounds like it goes beyond normal b.o.

I dont really have any advice though. Sorry. I have annoying neighbors too and i havent even gotten around to writing them a note yet

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens ~Tolkien


#16 Piaf

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Posted May 01 2016 - 06:30 AM

 

 

 I think this may be partially a culture issue, because he comes from a culture where parents don't teach their children basic life skills, like how to do laundry and take care of yourself on a regular basis.

 

 

 

 

 

Yeah, I'm with lode and melilalailei.

 

I need to know what culture this is. 



#17 Bud D

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Posted May 01 2016 - 06:34 AM

Is he living with dead hookers?

 

I had a neighbor that died and nobody found him for about a week.  I called the police because of the smell.  They kicked in the door and found what was remaining.  It was a stinky situation!



#18 Heat

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Posted May 01 2016 - 07:47 AM

I also wonder if it could be in part due to mental health issue, inducing hoarding as they tend to get pretty smelly places.   I think I would approach your landlord about this again and if they fail to act on it I would then put it in writing to them.

 

It is their responsibility to handle this not yours and it could cause conflict for you with your neighbour in the future if you do so.


gallery_10_10951_30242.gif

 

The dew of compassion is a tear.
Lord Byron

Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.
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#19 Asmo

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Posted May 01 2016 - 08:09 AM

I would just be straight up with in person and tell him whats on your mind in the kindness way of course.


This. I don't get why a written note seems a better solution in regards to the smelly dude. I can see why you prefer it as it is less confronting ;)
If i have nice chats with my neighbour i would respond better to a complaint made in person instead of finding a note on my door.

Posted Image


#20 I'minmyunderwear

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Posted May 01 2016 - 08:51 AM

the only person i've known with this sort of hygiene issue was jewish.  so i have to assume that's what this neighbor is too.

 

we had a mutual friend at the time who used to spray febreze on him whenever she saw him.  it was not as effective as hoped.  eventually he failed out of college and moved back in with his mom, so as far i know, the issue ended then.  maybe that will happen to your neighbor.



#21 lode

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Posted May 01 2016 - 10:09 AM

the only person i've known with this sort of hygiene issue was jewish.  so i have to assume that's what this neighbor is too.

 

we had a mutual friend at the time who used to spray febreze on him whenever she saw him.  it was not as effective as hoped.  eventually he failed out of college and moved back in with his mom, so as far i know, the issue ended then.  maybe that will happen to your neighbor.

 

You've only known one stinky person before?

Where do you live? 


I can't fit the phrase 'Snoopys Penis Rules' into every post.


#22 Bud D

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Posted May 01 2016 - 10:18 AM

I also new a Jewish person that was said to be stinky.  He wanted to be a hippy and stopped taking care of his hygiene.  It was rumored that the health department made an issue of that.

 

Just to put it out there most Jewish people I've known were clean.



#23 Meliai

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Posted May 01 2016 - 10:23 AM

There was an egyptian guy when i wss in 8th grade that didnt wear deodorant. He rode my bus and the whole bus made a big deal about it. One day i had some deodorant in my gym bag so i tossed it ov er the seat to him. I still feel bad about that. Kids are cruel

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens ~Tolkien


#24 I'minmyunderwear

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Posted May 01 2016 - 10:35 AM

You've only known one stinky person before?

Where do you live? 

 

well, i left out the smelly kid in elementary school.  i think every class is required to have one, so that's not so much cultural as it is just being the person that the classroom stink gremlins chose to attack.

 

other than that, i can only think of the one.  sure, i've met plenty of stinky people, but none that i would claim to know.



#25 Mattekat

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Posted May 01 2016 - 12:28 PM

Yep. in grade 8 I sat beside the stinkiest Russian guy ever. Someone left a bar of soap on his desk once. It was kind of mean, but also sitting beside him and breathing was hard.

He only overly stinky person I know now acutely does have very serious depression, so maybe mental health has something to do with your neighbours stinky problems, like others have said. I always feel bad for my friend's neighbours. No one ever visits him anymore because there is a stench in the hallway before you even get in his apartment and being inside makes your eyes water.
"Life is change. Have some fun."

#26 Piaf

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Posted May 01 2016 - 12:32 PM

Ok so far we have

jewish

egyptian

russian



#27 Spaceman Spiff

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Posted May 01 2016 - 01:37 PM

my guess is asian



#28 Moonglow181

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Posted May 01 2016 - 03:48 PM

I will guess from India....My mom told me about a couple that lived in an apt where she lived at one time, and how the odors were permeating everywhere cooking Eastern Indian dishes all of the times, that she did not like to smell......and if one is not used to their way of cooking and using herbs and spices, it can be intolerable to the Western nose, I have concluded about that.


Edited by Moonglow181, May 01 2016 - 03:49 PM.


#29 Ashalicious

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Posted May 01 2016 - 04:39 PM

Okay. I'll tell you guys. He is Turkish, from Istanbul.

There is some good advice here. I think I'll probably speak to the landlord again, and hopefully he will do something about it. In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have written that note. But I was beyond frustrated at that time, and sick of drowning in stench.
Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

#30 Asmo

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Posted May 02 2016 - 09:21 AM

I'm just wondering now if you signed the note or left it anonymous.
If you put your name under it that would make all the difference for me if I were him. But saying it in person would be the preferred way imho

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