Cockney Rhyming Slang

I know I'm a yank but have lived amongst Brits. Now I'm sipping a Britney reflecting reflecting on the intricacies of Cockney rhyming slang and would like to become fluent.

I think these two bits were brilliant:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RWoxUvWHtB4

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RWoxUvWHtB4

C/S,
Rev J

 

You having a bubble mate?

 

A bit. I'd just like a bit of a chance at the nuclear sub throwing a couple of Britney Spears down the old battle cruiser with me Chinas. I don't want to look daft when some bird opens up her uncle Bert and shows me her Bristols. Although that might cause a bit of tension with the old trouble.

C/S,
Rev J

 

Well I don't have a trouble and strife; I'm happy with a daily board and plank

 

Better than a Jimmy Riddle in your Tony Blairs.

C/S,
Rev J

 

Although a J. Arthur will get you through when you can't get a Donald Duck.

C/S,
Rev J

 

I just love watching the two little guys! Lol
http://aldertons.com

Found this, and thought of you Rev

 

Much thanks!

C/S,
Rev J

 

Stop being such a Jeremy!

 

Don't make me smack you in the North and South and knock out your Hamptons.

C/S,
Rev J

 

Meanwhile in the land of the Scouse, Yorkshire and Geordie there's a whole different language

 

http://youtu.be/jV2_HwFO9kg

 

We scousers talk like this, don't we though!

https://youtu.be/5Yt8tygDXzc

 

I thought it was more like this...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpYbK588nB0

 

Stop missing anointing silly saucepan lids.

 

Stop messing around you silly saucepan lids.

 

No, that's what cockneys pretending to be scousers sound like, lol

 

Spittin' oil like a bubble and squeak.

 

You lot must be 'avin a giraffe, ain'tcha

 

I don't watch Eastenders now at all, but must say I did used to enjoy Danny Dyer's cockney slangs. "..bar full of treacles" is my favourite.... treacle tarts lol