What Should I Do?

Discussion in 'Sexual Health' started by Wheeliegirl, Jun 19, 2015.

  1. Wheeliegirl

    Wheeliegirl Members

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    In my friendship group I have a male friend who has had a sexual relationship with a mutual girl friend and she claims he haver her Chlamydia. Blame aside, it was present in the relationship. she went to the clinic and was treated but said on telling him, he didn't seem bothered and she doubted he got treated.
    Anyway, he's been sleeping with another girlfriend of mine and that's recently gone sour too. I only found out about this today.
    Should I tell her she should get checked? I feel awful that I know but also terrible to panic and put her through it if he did get sorted and she's clean.
    I really don't know which to do for the best, he's also a mutual friend but suspecting he isn't clean and her not knowing is bad too.
    Help! X
     
  2. Sunlover1954

    Sunlover1954 Members

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    Well, how about bringing up the topic by saying that it's always good to have periodic sexual health checks, not mentioning by name of the person . And see what there response is
     
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  3. Ashalicious

    Ashalicious Senior Member

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    Yes, you should definitely tell her.

    Put yourself in her shoes. If that was you, you'd want someone to tell you.
     
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  4. NoxiousGas

    NoxiousGas Old Fart

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    Yeah, you need to tell her straight out, don't mess around with something that could have life long implications for your friend.
    and if the guy didn't get checked/treated and then went on to have sex with other people, who gives flying fuck what that moron thinks and more appropriately I wouldn't consider him a friend.
    I usually don't go around knowingly infecting my friends with diseases, do you?
     
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  5. Wheeliegirl

    Wheeliegirl Members

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    Thank you for all your sensible replies and comments. I suppose I do have a social responsibility to gently warn her. :(
     
  6. Wheeliegirl

    Wheeliegirl Members

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    X
     
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  7. Ashalicious

    Ashalicious Senior Member

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    This woman is your FRIEND. You have a responsibility as a friend to warn her.
     
  8. Wheeliegirl

    Wheeliegirl Members

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    Yes but he is also a friend, might well have been sorted out and this might cause a lot of heartache over nothing. Can't you see?
     
  9. Ashalicious

    Ashalicious Senior Member

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    Not really, no.

    Why don't you call him up then, and ask him if he sorted it out?
     
  10. MikeE

    MikeE Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    I would tread lightly. Saying that someone has an STD is libelous. And you don't know.

    At the same time, it sounds like your social circle needs to remember to practice safe sex (i.e. use condoms) AND also to have regular checks for STDs.

    Reminding your friends of those two practices is not libelous. But libeling a friend, based on assumptions that are derived from the word of an ex-girlfriend, not wise.

    You should talk to your male friend about his history and practices. And to your female friend who is dating him.
     
  11. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    Well, with the ex saying, "he didn't get treated," is basically a rumor.
    The right thing to do is tell the person who is the subject of the rumor.
    So talk to him, first.
    If he says he didn't, then chat with her.


    And what happened to being responsible and using a condom?
     
  12. chris27wjoyner

    chris27wjoyner Members

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    The first thing I get from this post is the guy is sick with an STD, this guy also knows that he is sick. You should tell everyone in your sex group that he is sick, knows about and is fucking anyways. If he doens't stop he could have everyone infected, everyone in your group should know about the danger.
     
  13. joan819

    joan819 Members

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    I think you shouldnt tell of his opponents. If you sign, it will much sad people there. I was Alo11 (A11) will help you somewhat for you
     
  14. Pieceofmyheart

    Pieceofmyheart Grumpy old bitch HipForums Supporter

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    Why aren't young people who have casual sex (even short term relationships) using condoms? I know it isn't as much fun...but seriously?
     
  15. SunshineSummerlott

    SunshineSummerlott Members

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    You need to tell her and you need to speak to this dude if he is your friend as well or you at least care about his well being. Show them love and support and they will be open with you. Just let them know you only want them to be able to live long, healthy, and happy lives.
     
  16. mathias0815

    mathias0815 Members

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    Just out of curiosity: Did you tell your gf about your ideas? And how did it finally turn out?
     
  17. Dana Ran

    Dana Ran Members

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    I think that you have to tell her the truth as it concerns her health.
     

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