This is fast becoming a MAJOR pet peeve of mine. In the days of smart phones and facebook, it is like no one can make plans in advance anymore! I am always flooded with last frikin minute invites, and it is driving me fucking bananas. I need more than 5 minutes warning if you want to meet for drinks. Or more than 4 hours notice if you want me to watch your kid. Or more than 2 hours notice to go on a st. pattys day pub crawl. Yeah, it is great to be popular and to even have friends that think of me and take the time to include me, but for the love of all things holy, can we not just make plans a few days in advance? End rant.
In my family, it's just something you have to get used to. Mom: "I told you about this 2 months ago" Me: "Psh, whatever you say crazy lady."
my family, you tell them about something for months, and then it reaches crisis point and everyone acts like they hadn't heard or seen the signs. i think it's hard to deal with the thought they could have made it work out. and just in general, yeah, i hate that it's almost considered rude now not to pick up your phone. i have one friend in particular who's always calling me up like "i'm coming by, i'm right down the street," and i'm like yeah? is that what's happening? i finally had to have a talk with him about it.
Oh my goodness, that would drive me bonkers. Like, what If you're in the middle of something? What if you are laying around in your undies and don't actually want company? I agree, it is almost considered rude to not pick up your phone. When did this happen? How did the conversation go with your friend? Was he receptive to it?
What annoys me is when I plan something and give people plenty of time to let me know if they will be attending but people dont tell me until the last minute...or at all...if they will be there or not. Like they are just holding out for something better to come along. Or maybe I wont notice if they dont show up. I dont give a shit if people make it to all of my parties or not because we host a lot of events. I don't expect everyone to stop their lives to hang out with me but if they could at least tell me so I know what to plan for, that would be fucking amazing. I have an annual St Pattys Day party. I wasnt going to have it this year because I had a lot of other stuff going on around that time. I always have it on the saturday nearest the actual date. This year on the Wednesday before when the party would have been I started getting texts from people telling me they would be at my party on Saturday. Only problem was, I wasnt having a party and didnt invite anyone to a party. So I had a party. Sent out invites on Wednesday and still ended up with close to 30 people here for the party with only a few days notice.
What irritates me is when we do plan out something early, and then someone ditches out on those plans at the last minute. Yesterday my boyfriend was texting a buddy of his. His friend says he wants to hang out when my boyfriend gets off work, so we plan for his friend to come over and schedule our evening around this. It gets to be an hour or so before we're supposed to go pick up his friend, and the friend stops answering. Turns out his buddy decided to hang out with someone else, but instead of telling us, he just decided not to answer his phone. So his friend says, "I'll text you when my friend leaves and you guys can come pick me up." By now it's almost 10. My boyfriend calls him up and asks him if he wants to hang out- he says he'll get a ride over right now. We don't hear from him. Finally at 11, we just told him to forget it. If you say you're coming over, do it. We scheduled our evening around you- it's not like we were doing much, but we still like to have plans held up.
Exactly. That friend should have been kind enough to have some regard for you and your boyfriend's time. Kind of like people who are chronically late. They have no regard for the fact that they are keeping someone waiting, and seem to think their time is more valuable than other peoples time.
Ugh, yes. People that have no sense of other people's time just grind my gears. That includes people that are always late and keep people waiting, or when I tell someone "Hey, can you be here at 8? I need to leave here by 8 so that I can make it there by 10." and they show up at 8:15. Then there's those people who you can say, "Hey, I'd love to talk but I can't for too long, I have ___________ to do soon" and then they talk your ear off. I just can't stand people that have no sense of timing xD
Personally, being late gives me anxiety. I am always 10 minutes early. I HATE being late. My husband, on the other hand, he always waits until the last possible minute to leave, and is usually always 5 or 10 minutes late. He knows better than to keep me waiting though. HA!
Hahaha, being late makes me anxious too! I can't stand being late and being the last person to walk in the room. My boyfriend is the type of person that says "I'll be there in 15 minutes" and then he doesn't show up for like 45 minutes aha.
I dont mind last minute plans. I'm kinda moody and I can be very introverted so sometimes if I make plans in advance I just wont feel like it when the time comes or I'll get a bad case of social anxiety and end up cancelling. I pretty much never know until the day of if I really want to do something or not.
^ what she said. even "day of" i don't necessarily know if i'll want to do something. it might sound like great fun at 10am, but by the time i get off work it might sound like torture. or vice versa. i can see where that might be annoying to people who like to plan things, and i do acknowledge that certain bigger events just won't work without advance notice. but for basic "let's hang out" type plans, i stand by what i just typed.
I live well out of the way from some of my good friends, you have to advance days, weeks even months.
Psh, I don't remember the last time I was in a social setting. Overall, I don't get into them often to know if I'm one of these people you're peeved about or if I would be peeved by one. However, let me think. .... I wouldn't be peeved by people who make last minute plans. There is something exciting about getting last minute plans and only have a limited amount of time to prepare myself. I really enjoy it. It's nice to know I can feel put together within a few minutes. Also, it doesn't give me a chance to think about said plans, which is usually why I back out of things... when I start thinking about it. As for someone changing plans on me, I'll be fine with it. Shit happens. I would be a little hurt if they never told me about the plans changing, though. Not annoyed, but actually hurt because I would feel unimportant. Now on to me. Overall I'm not the type of person to make plans, whether they're longterm or last minute plans. However, if I can make a guess of what kind of planner I would be, I think I would be a last minute planner. As I said above, the more time I have to think and feel in regards to my decision making the least likely I'll decide to do whatever I'm considering. So, last minute planning would work the best for me. As for whether or not I'm an attendant to an invite, normally I wouldn't be. Mostly because I get exhausted and rather just stay home. But, I'm not a flake either. I won't tell you that I'm going to something, but not go. I just will never give you a straight answer of whether or not I'm going. And odds are the day of I will decide not to go. I guess we wouldn't get along. But, I think if you met me you would understand why I'm the way I am.
that's usually my strategy too. i think it pisses people off, but it's the most honest option, because i really don't know until last minute.
Yup. Yup. Me too. I would hate to say I would do something and not end up doing it. Sure, my answer usually leans to not doing something, but sometimes... just sometimes... I do end up doing it. I'll only know when whatever that something is nearly approaching. I won't know days, weeks, months before than, though.
