What Constitutes Loss Of Virginity?

Words are agreed upon, and are sensitive to usage. Nobody uses virginity to describe being asexual, we already have the word asexual. Virginity is always used to refer to a person that has not participated in a certain sexual act, but the problem is agreeing upon what act removes this label.

 

As far as I can tell, there is no such thing as virginity.

 

Asexuality, single cell division, sex wasn't always a part concern or consideration of life. There is an experiential conjugation for every word we utter. A word is symbol for a condition and to know it's meaning put yourself in it's condition. A word is real, what is not real does not exist. If you recognize it clearly it's definition in is it's appearance. But we can't see that because we think we have to qualify appearances. Appearances come not in quality but in numbers, i.e. statistical analysis of a broad sampling. We figured a way to divide the clock by watching the redundant pattern. As far as you could tell is not as far as you could look. The world is substantial and so are you. The world doesn't have problems, we make problems for ourselves through ignorant choices and ignorant choices come from lack of information.

 

Nobody has a standard scale and there is all kinds of contention over it.
This is standard metric that everyone can assume with out fear of being accused of not doing it right.
You are welcome to your confusion but I am telling it creates a perverted emotional scene for far too many. like honor killings of daughters.

 

Your argument makes no sense. You seem to be saying, that simply because we can measure something or place it on a scale, it leads to honor killings if you deviate from a norm. It's like you're saying very generally, that differences cause problems, therefore we should not measure differences, when we should really just be able to accept differences. Virginity is simply an agreed upon definition because it is a word, you're making this a major problem when it doesn't need to be.

 

OK, this thread is really starting to wander off into the twilight zone (IMO). I'm going to try to drag it back on track (to the extent that it's possible.)

Given that the most common agreed upon definition of lose of virginity for a heterosexual couple is the vagina being penetrated by a penis, my question is: does penetration by fingers qualify equally? I'm strictly interested in alternate parts of the male partners anatomy doing the penetrating in place of the penis. No artificial objects, no self-penetration by the female, just that action as stated in the second sentence (in this post).

 

My vote is no. This a question like 'what is the best pizza', it's completely subjective. The reason I say no, is simply because it's not anal, vaginal or oral sex.

 

No I am saying without a standard definition on that point there are all kinds of interpretations of what virginity means and some of those interpretations lead to honor killings and the like,
unwanted consequences. If we had a standard measture we could put everyone on that scale and they all weigh the same just like a pound of feathers weighs the same as a pound of rocks.

 

Not if you except the most common definition.

 

I don't know----it is such a tough thing-----I mean, virginity is such a fleeting thing. I've dated all kinds of virgins---and each time, we start fooling around, we have a little sex, and then suddenly they are telling me they are not virgins anymore-----I mean WTF! It's so hard to find a virgin who stays that way. One day I'm dating a virgin, the next day I'm not---what's happening here?????


Seriously though----I don't think I've ever met a virgin that was experienced and good in bed------I'm not talking about fingering---I'm talking about seriously experienced...

My wife had children when I married her, but she was a devout catholic---so I am assuming that means she could've had virgin births, right?

-----Ok, for real seriously----Roorshack said it was a stupid question, I have never really thought virginity was a bid deal---except that I have been with two virgins---when I lost my own virginity, she was a virgin, and even I knew that we were going about it in a clumsy manner. The second virgin I was with was also not exactly a great lay. And there are things I suggested that would have enhanced her experience----like eating her out---but she didn't want anything to do with it.

 

Therein lies the rub

 

I'd define it as any kind of sexual activity, but why does anybody care about these petty technicalities? Word games are for children.

 

I agree with Karen.

Virginity is an agreed upon fictional that's used to define and pigeonhole people.

As we've discussed, "sex" looks different for everyone, depending on their sexual orientation and philosophical views. The concept has been traditionally used against women, to cause shame and paint a picture of either purity or immorality. Who wins here? I'm not sure. It's about time we dropped the concept and stopped caring who has stuck what in each hole.

 

Thing is about conception is it can't be put back into the bottle. The best we hope to do is more definitely inform those conceptions. Education.

 

So that our children might grow up.

 

Getting rid of the virginity concept may help certain adults to grow up too

 

True in a sense. An adult doesn't do childish things. Mental maturity is not a matter of years but being fundamentally informed.

 

Reading this in a more sober state, I see why that didn't convey what I meant it to....

To clarify, I meant that you can make a good reply to a bad topic, and your reply and serious consideration is still worth something.

The nature of the whole virginity construct is interesting if you're interested in social psychology, how to improve the world or whatever, or it might be fine to comment on in a light way, but not as some sort of personal puzzler, like what you personally think should constitute virginity, as the OP is discussing it. Lots of answers might be fine, and not inherently as small-minded as the way he's framing the question.

As this state could be more sober still, this still may not say what I'm trying to convey.

 

The word only seems useful to me when it's used to label somebody who, sexually, doesn't know what the hell they're doing. Of course, having sex a few times doesn't automatically cure that problem, so maybe the word is no longer useful at all.

Sexual ignorance is the real problem, not body functions.

 

Better not tell Milton Bradley, Parker Brothers and Mattel. They've been making a fortune off Scrabble(tm) for years.

Seriously, what do you tell someone if they ask you when you lost your virginity? Depending upon how my original question is answered, my wife could say either her senior year of high school (to her boy friend), or the summer between her freshman and sophomore years of college (to me). I just want the question answered, not critiqued, for Christ sake! Half of what I'm getting on this thread is akin to "Well, THAT'S a stupid question!" It's not helping!