I'm Finding out that I do not feel good when I'm with people or with friends

Discussion in 'Mental Health' started by Wolfman's Brother, Jul 27, 2014.

  1. Wolfman's Brother

    Wolfman's Brother Member

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    When I'm near people I don't feel so free I get a feeling that I need to go into their world and kinda feel like they do,think what they do (because of the topic we are having) and so on, I fell kinda trapped in their view of the world. I also do not stand the moaning or the topics people chose to talk (in most cases). And If some people talk slow or with an particular voice or have an particular face or are doing some particular things I kinda link them as boring or sad,uninteresting or bad vibes people. I know that this is all inside my head but how do I stop my mind from guessing the feelings of other people or getting sucked in their states or feeling the "negative" energy from them. How can I put myself on the ground and stop guessing what kind of people they are,where should I put my attention to when this happens,should I follow it or just force quit it,...Why do I even care what other people feel,or what kind of people they are,what does this have to do with me ?

    In additional I always enjoyed time away from people but I never didn't got sucked into their states this "symptoms" started showing when I was an heavy marijuana user but now I'm clean for 4 months or more and I still get this feelings (oh god why do they talk so slow they must be so boring,...) just not so strong and I can control it with ease,but If I would to smoke I would probably go into the rabbit hole again (If I smoke alone I enjoy it It is just wonderful but If I'm high and close to people this will turn into a living hell for me,and I just need to go away from them and be in nature around trees)

    I hope you can give me some advice because this is starting to really annoy me
     
  2. TheSamantha

    TheSamantha Member

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    I would study Buddhism: not liking or disliking, non-resistance to the present moment, letting thoughts float freely in and out, etc.
     
  3. AmericanTerrorist

    AmericanTerrorist Bliss

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    I think it's anxiety. I get kinda like that... not exactly--- but bored with people and just in generally irritated by them and not wanting to deal with all the random people out and about in the world (at stores and stuff) ....when I'm feeling anxious. Advice? Well if you feel it may have something to do with anxiety, find ways to deal with that.

    Otherwise I'd say... just don't worry about other people so much. Just worry about yourself.
     
  4. Ernesto Apocaloptimisto

    Ernesto Apocaloptimisto self-banned

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    99% or more of humans have been so devolved by our corrupt civilization that you're essentially hanging out with chimps, hoping to have a good conversation. Don't let it get to you. There are a few real people left. The weed makes you see the truth. If I'm not high, I can almost watch TV without vomiting. If I'm high, all I can see is the brainwashing bullshit and I turn it off immediately. It's a good filter.
     
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  5. Pressed_Rat

    Pressed_Rat Do you even lift, bruh?

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    I can relate to what the OP is saying. Most people just don't do anything for me.
     
  6. happilyinlove

    happilyinlove with myself :p

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    The world is over populated.
     
  7. VerySexual

    VerySexual Members

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    Wanting to be in nature when you are high is pretty natural.
     
  8. ~Zen~

    ~Zen~ Ancient Mariner Administrator

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    Perhaps being outdoors in nature, leaving the cell phone, tablet and electronics behind, would be a good way to start getting in touch with yourself...you have to know yourself before you can do anything in this life, or it's just mindless ambling about waiting for the end...

    At least you have the sense to know that you are different from others.
     
  9. Ernesto Apocaloptimisto

    Ernesto Apocaloptimisto self-banned

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    I always feel a little better after I get in touch with myself...hehe.....in nature is even better!
     
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  10. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    I kinda feel like that too I was just telling this to a friend a few days ago I don't enjoy how when ur with people u need to like adapt to this specific person or group so that every one is comfortable or that conversation flows better I just wanna be me all the time and it's hard to do that with people they want u to be the u they have in their heads and every time they see u deviate from that it seems to upset them
     
  11. Ernesto Apocaloptimisto

    Ernesto Apocaloptimisto self-banned

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    Just be you Suger! It will force you to find your tribe! I'm always amazed with the wingnutness I can get away with around seemingly "normal" people. Sometimes they get wierd and then I know they're not friends. Sometimes they overlook the crazy because of the things that are good about me in their eyes, and keep voluntarily exposing themselves to my wingnut thoughts. Sometimes.....rarely.....they open up and start being themselves too.

    While "sucking it up" and putting on a show might gain you a tiny bit of solace, being yourself at all times will free you!
     
  12. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    I've never had anyone really enjoy my true self lol
     
  13. wtfisthatkid

    wtfisthatkid Member

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    I understand this completely.
    Honestly, I think if you are getting bad vibes or negative feelings from someone..avoid them. They may not truly be someone youd want to hangout around.
    Connect with people who give you positive vibes instead, those people are more likely to give you a positive life experience and share truly useful knowledge with you.
     
  14. ginalee14

    ginalee14 eternity

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    First, no .. it is not all inside your head.

    You seem to be very mentally oriented. That's not a bad thing but it can be troubling (as you are experiencing). How do you stop guessing what kind of people they are? You can stop guessing and start asking them. Engage them in a conversation, instead of having one in your head. YOU are the only one who can answer the question you asked: what kind of people they are, what it has to do with you. Good question! What does it have to do with you? Is it about their worthiness? Or your own worthiness. Maybe it's about whether or not they're somebody you'd like to actually build a real friendship with but you're leaving it all to head work. But then, it does seem that you've already judged and decided that they're too negative for you. If that is your conclusion, time to take your next steps right?

    If you like to examine, contemplate and mentally explore .. acknowledge that. Then find the purpose for those mental aptitutes, and build your life.
     
  15. tarotsailor

    tarotsailor Members

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    I stay clear as crystal and let their energy pass right through. Being a witness doesn't change me. I need to have privacy from people, but when I'm around them, I open myself fully. Particularly if they're negative people or enemies. Because then I read them. If you're fighting in the dark, you lead with your fingers, not a fist.
     
  16. Spectacles

    Spectacles My life is a tapestry Lifetime Supporter

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    I hope you never need to become caregiver for someone with Alzheimer's.
     
  17. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    I just had like a slumber party with two friends and when morning came I like hated them and I was upset that they were my friends like it was my fault for being so unhappy with them because I had chosent them and put myself in this situation where these two people I really don't want to know are my friends.
     
  18. Bilby

    Bilby Lifetime Supporter and Freerangertarian Super Moderator

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    Wolfman's Brother it sounds like you are an introvert like I am. Are you lime feel less lonely up the top of a mountain than in a crowded pub? Do you live in the big smoke or the country? For you, the best view of the big city is what you see in the rear view mirror leaving it.
     
  19. Wolfman's Brother

    Wolfman's Brother Member

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    I live in a mountain town and I avoid public gathering like the plague,but I do enjoy the people who are found at reggae festivals or goa trance festivals (chill out area).I can be in a such group of people with ease,but I can't stand being around "normal" or everyday folks,or being at shows when the music is aggressive and everyone are out of their fucking minds and they just want to explode because they drank to much or snorted to much synthetic shit up their nose. But as I said before I do enjoy laid back,peace loving people who don't bug anyone and they just chill the whole day and you can start an easy going conversation with them,... (this is why I enjoy reggae festivals because people there are mostly like that)

    But I did make some improvements;I stopped judging people that are around me. And I just let them be,I keep in mind whenever I started to judge (which is pretty rear now): Do not judge people because you can't be free if you judge people. And when people do bad things this makes it possible for them to do good things,so I love them not for what they do,but I love them and accept them for what they are. Meditation also helped me with this a lot,because whenever my mind starts to wonder I just bring it back to the moment now,or just focus on my breath or I do a body scan (I only need to do this if I'm on a trip,if I'm sober there is no need for such things)

    So now I'm pretty happy with myself and others around me,since I let go of judging I really freed myself from unnecessary suffering and now I can enjoy the company of people who aren't my cup of tea or even start to enjoy a moment when if I would still stick with judging would give me a total bad trip but now I can turn an bad environment,bad moment or people who I don't like into something I can enjoy.
     
  20. RooRshack

    RooRshack On Sabbatical

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    You are blaming others for the way you feel.

    Nobody can make you feel any way, but you.

    As for why, it may be anxiety, or it may be something else. But it's not the other people, it's you not being comfortable - if you can't be comfortable around others, you're not comfortable with yourself (generally).

    Of course it's acceptable to not like some people, or not want to be in some situations - but when it's a systematic part of your approach to life, there is a problem other than the people. Even in a sick society, you need to be able to be comfortable and ride out other people's problems without being dragged down.

    It's also okay to like being alone - I like it a lot. But you need to be able to be comfortable and happy around people, too.
     
    1 person likes this.

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