I was wondering if any one still goes down the isle / sets up home with someone and is a virgin on the first night together ?
my friends got married a few years back and they were both virgins, religious values. He got teased a lot and they kept telling him "what happens if she's a star fish?" Well about a month before the wedding she gave him a present, she had gone to the sex store and bought lotions and toys and told him that once they are married they'd have fun. All the stuff was in the packages so it was all unused. They took a week off when they got married and he told me later that they went like bunnies.
This weekend I met a beautiful 20-year-old woman who is a virgin. She is extremely sexy looking and is a Christian. She doesn't want to wait until marriage. She does want to wait until she is sure it would be a loving experience. No, I did not volunteer.
I know a dude who didn't even kiss his girlfriend/now wife until their wedding day. He belonged to some weird fundamentalist Christian church.
Why not? If they really do it on a voluntarily basis I don't see why we (you) should hope this never happens anymore. To each their own. Right?
It seems dysfunctional. The couple may be sexually incompatible, and not know it until it's too late.
Sometimes I wonder how many people were married as virgins, and are having terrible sex and don't know any better.
Mama, have you read Love and Sex recently? They know. I do know couples who were married as virgins. They came from communities that expected that, and they don't engage in western media to any great degree. Those things combined make them very happy. I'm happy for them, even as it sounds unbelievable.
I haven't read over there very much. I believe people can absolutely be happy marrying as virgins. I just wonder if the ones cut off from media, most internet, etc. (like extreme fundamentalists) would know if something was amiss.
I know those people too. It doesn't sound unbelievable to me at all (I kind of pity the people who can't imagine other people living happy but such other lifes as themselves really..)! But there are also still a lot of married people who don't know any better or who suspect it but don't do anything about their terrible sex life, I'm sure... Not sure if most of them are in our parts of the world though.
It's not that I can't imagine anyone different than me living happily. I'm just curious if they would know when it's bad. My lifestyle is not one I would ever recommend. It something people should only do if they feel strongly inclined to do so. There's no need to pity me.
I'm sure some people don't find their sex lives to be very good, whether or not they are aware that it could be much better. I've been with a few guys whose sense of timing was very different from my own, or did something highly annoying during sex, or the things that turned him on didn't appeal to me. If I had married one of those guys as a virgin 100 years ago, I might have gone through life thinking that sex was equally bad for every woman. Everybody has to decide for themselves what level of risk they are comfortable with, and nothing is ever risk-free. Ironically, the highest risk of all is aiming for zero risk, because you have a 100% chance of living a boring life. That's essentially sitting in a rocking chair and waiting to die.
For the first part, that's kind of what was getting at. I wonder if they would just assume sex isn't fun for women. For the second part. That's exactly how I feel. It's still not something I would ever suggest to anyone (maybe in jest). As you well know, if you have the mental and emotional compatibility for it..... Holy shit is it a whole lot of fun.