Herpes

Discussion in 'Sexual Health' started by topgun2, May 2, 2014.

  1. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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    I met a person that Ive dated for about a week and they just sprung on me that they have genitals herpes. We havent slept together and I dont know if I can risk it. She said it was like zero chance of her giving it to me but I did some research and I dont think that is really true.

    What do you guys think?

    Also, during my internet research which I realize might not be the best source of info, I found what appears to be the biggest herpes forum in the world so I browsed the site and there are people really suffering from this disease in a bad way so now Im even more scared to risk it.

    Finally, I couldnt believe that some of the people on the site were telling others not to disclose to partners that they had herpes and that it was just a coldsore and its no big deal or whatever. What is up with them purposely infecting others? That just seems wrong.
     
  2. Deranged

    Deranged Senor Member

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    id be wary of the character of a chick with herpes who claims shes safe to bang

    Then theres the fact she has herpes

    Not worth it
     
  3. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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  4. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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    Thats what Im thinking and I dont want to be mean but I dont think I like her enough to take that kind of risk.
     
  5. usedtobehoney

    usedtobehoney Senior Member

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    Pretty sure condoms protect against STDs. :/
     
  6. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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    Thats what I originally thought but they dont protect against herpes because there is still skin to skin contact in some areas where the condom doesnt cover. I talked to my doc about it and he said people with herpes can have outbreaks anywhere below the belt and its not always in the same place. He said the base of the penis often gets exposed with condoms so there is genital skin contact for both partners. He said you could get in anywhere below the belt and it could still appear in the genitals later. He said something about it hiding in the spine after infection and on later outbreaks when it travels back down the nerve it can take a different path and thats why it doesnt always appear in the same place. Scary stuff for sure. He said some people rarely suffer outbreaks and others have back to back outbreaks forever.
     
  7. Karen_J

    Karen_J Visitor

    There are other fish in the sea.
     
  8. Coleco

    Coleco Member

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    Just wear a condom. Hope that you can trust her when she says shes not having an outbreak. Dont let anyone tell you condoms are no good. Dont get passionate and think, "oh fuck it im not gonna get off my ass and go fetch that condom, I love this person and the condom isnt gonna protect me anyway". The condom WILL protect you. Even though theres still skin to skin contact and you still have a chance of contracting herpes im thinking that you will minimize contact surface. In other words, I think if you wear a condom you could protect your dick from getting herpes, but your nutz and the area around the base of the penis could still pick up herpes.
    Ive heard theres lots of relationships where one person has herpes, and the other doesn't and they keep it that way.
    But yea... Theres no reason why you should have to take any risk at all on the person, especially since you dont love her... So if she wants sex tell her to go find another guy whose got herpes. Even two people with herpes have to be careful though.. But hey there still in the same boat and all with their STD's so there is likely going to be less insecurity with each other if they both got it.
     
  9. DoForLove

    DoForLove Member

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    Your doctor is right a 100%. I've heard the chance of someone giving you H lowers when they don't have an outbreak, but anyway... why risk it? Just don't have sex with this girl and find another one who's clean, there are plenty of other girls out there.
     
  10. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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    I decided to break it off with her now which is probably better for both of us rather than drag it out. Im not ready to be tied down or deal with herpes.
     
  11. Sallysmart

    Sallysmart Raynstorm Serenade

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    I hate to go against people with illnesses but STD illnesses I couldn't take the same risk they might have which caught them the disease, either carelessness or she trusted and caught it anyway. Either way you chance that now so good on you letting it go and not risking yourself.
    I guess if you already fell in love with her you might but yikes, it's a scary thing.
    Funny they haven't developed a vaccine for this that a partner could take to make sure for sure.
     
  12. topgun2

    topgun2 Guest

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    From what I read they have been trying to make one for years to prevent it but they cant get it to work. They dont even have that many meds to treat it and for some the meds dont work at all. The doc says herpes increases the risk of getting hiv through micro sores. Definitely some scary stuff.
     
  13. se7en_sins

    se7en_sins Member

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    I just read a statistic that 1 in 6 people in the United States have herpes. This is much higher then I thought. Education is certainly the key here.

    Let's hope a cute is on the horizon for those infected.
     
  14. gomerted

    gomerted Member

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    I had an attack out of nowhere about 6 months ago. It was very painful for about a week with loads of ulcer-type sores on my penis, especially on the glans. Gradually they dried up and have had no repeat. It is certain that I have been carry the virus and must have had it for maybe 10 years or so without an outbreak. This is rare but possible I found out through extensive research. I only have one partner so it was not possible to have caught it from another person. Apparently any future occurrence is likely to be less sever and am hoping it never reappears. My partner has not caught it and we discussed it at the time and avoided sex whilst I had the symptoms.

    Curious..........
     
  15. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

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    Nobody has said this yet.
    But it is very possible herpes (simplex 1 and/or simplex 2) is transferred from mother to child during childbirth.


    I read that it has been documented especially in the case of vaginal delivery, and it is rarer when it comes to Caesarian delivery, but still possible.



    So it is totally possible to be a virgin and have the oral and/or genital variation of the virus.


    You can also get the oral kind from the local public swimming pool too, chlorine doesn't solve everything folks.
     
  16. mudlife73

    mudlife73 Member

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    My ex wife had herpes and we were married for 5 years. She was careful and told me when she had an outbreak and I didn't get it. She only told me after and I was really upset and just thought it was her being cold all those years.

    If you have a cold sore on your lips and do oral sex it's the same thing and you will transmit it. You can transmit it with contact from your fingers.

    Condoms only work so much but if the person knows the signs of an outbreak and keeps a distance it can really help.

    I get cold sores on my lips and I always know a few days ahead that it's coming and it's the same thing for genital herpes. The ex told me that she could feel it a few days before.

    ALOT of people have this and I don't agree with not telling a person if you are going to have sex and specially unprotected sex.

    One of my friends got it and was a virgin but he let lots of woman give him oral...one of them had cold sores.
     
  17. thedocisin

    thedocisin Member

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    The girl was honest with you about it. That says a lot about her. Herpes is an annoying skin condition, but it's not the end of the world. I don't want it either, but it carries a worse stigma than it actually is. HSV1 is what causes cold sores. HSV2 is genital herpes.
     
  18. volunteer_tommy

    volunteer_tommy Elongated Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    1 person likes this.
  19. mudlife73

    mudlife73 Member

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    condoms don't protect against all STD's and you can catch a lot of things with oral sex. Watched a show where they told the guy to use saran wrap when he was going down on his woman...that must feel great for the woman.
     
  20. dxbcpls

    dxbcpls Guest

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    Ever thought of the toilets you use? I had an outbreak a few days back and on antiviral drugs. It seems in the office building we have, we share the restrooms with other offices in the same floor. It's a new type of toilets. Smaller and and can fit several cubicles in a small area. My doctor says if your private parts touch the those parts which has come in contact with from some infected it can spread. Made me learn to use the urinal only :(
     

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