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How To Pass a Urine Test :)


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#1 chairmanMEOW

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Posted April 28 2010 - 10:15 PM

So here's the skinny on products overall:

No matter what companies say, no matter what companies claim, their products are bunk. Especially when it comes to urine testing, all they do is flush your body of water. With hair testing, some products will attempt to cover the hair follicles and fool the test. This, of course, doesn't work when most labs such as psychemedics split the hair, wash it free of all that product, and then centrifuge to find drugs. You can pass a urine test and a hair test on your own. Without company help. :)

Urine Testing:

Materials needed:
- Water
- Red Bull/Gatorade (to make the pee not clear)
- Aspirin
- Rolaids can help but aren't completely necessary
- Depending on how much scrutiny the test results are subject to, you may need creatine as well.
- 4-5 hours before the test

Procedure: Start 4 hours before testing

1. You need to take 4. Yes 4. Aspirin. Its hard on your stomach and you'll feel weird so make sure you have some food in your body. Take it with at least 16 oz of water. Take 4 rolaids as well.

2. Next 45 minutes: Drink 8 oz of water every 15 minutes.

3. This is when I take the red-bull/monster/gatorade (16 oz worth). Take another 4 aspirin. at this point, you'll really really need to pee. Thats fine. Pee if you need to. You need to pee 3-4 times (it'll be dirty with drugs :X) before you'll start peeing clean.

4. Keep drinking 8 oz of gatorade/water every 15 minutes until test time.


Notes:

1. Depending on how stringent, they may check creatinine levels. If this is the case, you need to take some creatine 48 hours before the test. it takes 48 hours for the creatine to metabolize in your urine so taking more than usual when your pee is diluted will theoretically result in relatively normal levels.

2. red bull is there mainly cause of the niacin, it makes your pee yellow. if you don't like energy drinks. b12 does the trick. it usually takes 2 pees before it starts showing up in your system so don't pee clear only to come home and find out you're peeing orange. lol

3. aspirin assists in covering up thc metabolites, but its not the magic bullet. the magic bullet is flushing your system so you're peeing well below the cut-offs.

4. Everybody is different, I recommend trying this out yourself with a testing kit and see if i'm bullshitting you or not.


How do I know this? I used to be in the military until someone narc'ed me out for pot. I passed their piss test. 4 times in a row. So I had them scratching their heads for a long time. They ended up forcing me to resign by not allowing me to leave base for medical treatment because they had no scientific proof.

Drugs in my system: cannabis is your only enemy really. it stays in your system for a long time if you're a habitual smoker. others metabolize within 72 hours max.

#2 cataclysmic cognition

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Posted November 26 2011 - 02:13 PM

i pretty much used the exact method in the past and it works well :).

#3 s0ma

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Posted January 24 2012 - 11:03 PM

everything you posted was true sir.
also you can get creatine from red meat. so eat a nice bloody steak the night before.
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#4 eatlysergicacid

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Posted January 24 2012 - 11:36 PM

Wonderful guide. I've seen way too much misinformation on drug testing on these forums. This should be a sticky. It's very useful information.
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#5 midgardsun

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Posted January 25 2012 - 01:29 AM

The few times I got tested I drank lots of water only and it worked w/o a problem.
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#6 krozar

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Posted January 25 2012 - 02:04 AM

1. You need to take 4. Yes 4. Aspirin.


in mg? Aspirins seem to vary.
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#7 IslandHippie

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Posted April 09 2012 - 05:57 PM

I once had to do a surprise drug (urine) test for a first aid ticket physical... I didn't know what to do, so only let a small amount of pee in the cup, and added some tap water to it. I never got a call about anything bad with the test, but never saw any results. At the time I should have tested positive for both marijuana and cocaine.

#8 IslandHippie

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Posted April 09 2012 - 05:58 PM

in mg? Aspirins seem to vary.


Yeah, I would assume that is four regular strength aspirin... the smallest mg. The regular ones, nothing slow dissolving.

#9 eatlysergicacid

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Posted April 09 2012 - 06:14 PM

I once had to do a surprise drug (urine) test for a first aid ticket physical... I didn't know what to do, so only let a small amount of pee in the cup, and added some tap water to it. I never got a call about anything bad with the test, but never saw any results. At the time I should have tested positive for both marijuana and cocaine.


This is only going to work on cheap tests. Any real lab test will be able to tell that what's in the cup is mostly water, and the temperature would be off.
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#10 unfocusedanakin

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Posted April 10 2012 - 06:31 AM

This is only going to work on cheap tests. Any real lab test will be able to tell that what's in the cup is mostly water, and the temperature would be off.


True, but remember real tests are expensive. So expensive many companies go for the cheap ones. At least we have that working in our favor.
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#11 eatlysergicacid

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Posted April 10 2012 - 07:00 AM

True, but remember real tests are expensive. So expensive many companies go for the cheap ones. At least we have that working in our favor.


That is true, the main thing to be aware of is whether or not the cup has a temp strip. If it does then putting water in the cup can change the temperature and cause you to fail. Most cheap tests do have a temp strip.
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#12 eggsprog

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Posted April 10 2012 - 07:02 AM

just man up, stick a finger in your piss, and make sure the tap water is roughly the same temperature. or is it more exact than that?

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#13 eatlysergicacid

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Posted April 10 2012 - 07:16 AM

Some are more exact than others, and it depends a lot on how much the person administering the test cares. If you can get the tap water right around body temperature there won't be a problem, but im pretty sure anyone administering a drug test has the right to determine whether or not they're given a diluted sample, so if the sample is just too clear it could be an automatic fail. Again, that would just depend on the strictness of the individual administering the test.
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#14 banana_pancake

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Posted April 12 2012 - 11:12 AM

I had a UA today. Got up 4 hours early to do this. 30 minutes before I went and took my official UA, I took an at home test. Passed it. The only concern I had was that my urine never turned a light yellow color. But I told the lab tech that I never drink soda or anything that had caffeine in it, that i was on a strict water or gatorade only intake and that if it came back diluted it would ALWAYS come back like that (and i plan to continue to drink only gatorade or water for the next few days in case they make me retest) and after I gave her my sample she said that urine was supposed to be the color mine was and that it should be fine. Will know tomorrow or Monday whether I passed or not, but im sure it will be fine. Definitely works on at home tests lol.

#15 smokeythabear

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Posted June 05 2012 - 08:21 AM

Will this procedure work for opiates?

#16 eatlysergicacid

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Posted June 05 2012 - 10:24 AM

Will this procedure work for opiates?


Yes. Diluting works for all things tested for in urine.
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#17 smokeythabear

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Posted June 05 2012 - 12:38 PM

I took 3 hydrocodone(10mg) throughout the day, two days ago. I just tried this with a 6 step home test. Showed up a positive result for opiates. I would not trust this system at all. Best way to pass a drug test is to not have any drugs in your system.

#18 PEACEFUL LIBRA

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Posted June 05 2012 - 12:39 PM

grab one of those fake dicks

#19 eatlysergicacid

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Posted June 05 2012 - 01:30 PM

The best way to pass is to not take drugs. The next best is to substitute clean urine. Dilution is much less reliable, but it is the third best option. There is no way to guarantee success with dilution.

As for your opiate question, if that's the only time you've taken them recently, you should only test positive for another day or two, if that. Opiates are quick to leave your system.

If you have at least a couple days before your drug test, I wouldn't even worry about it. If you are worried, and you don't have the ability to sub clean urine, then you should dilute.
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#20 wallace2112

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Posted July 29 2012 - 05:30 PM

Does this work for probation DT's and the court appointed ones?

#21 eatlysergicacid

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Posted July 29 2012 - 05:34 PM

Yes, but don't count on it to work every time. If youre going to be tested regularly you need to stop using drugs. At the very least weed, because its really easy to fail a drug test for weed.
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#22 wallace2112

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Posted July 29 2012 - 05:37 PM

Yup im being tested regularly...

#23 Nunya68

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Posted July 18 2013 - 02:38 PM

OK I've been a smoker for a long time (30+ years) and have to take tests once in awhile to get my medications. I have tried everything under the sun and NOTHING worked. Saw this on the aspirin and thought what the heck. I've refrained for 50 days (only weigh 100 lbs soaking wet) and still showing up +! I usually clean myself once a year and freeze it so when the time comes I have MY OWN CLEAN URINE! But at day 50 still showing positive I was really getting bummed out and would like to have a toke! SO last night I found the info here and tried it. THE only thing I did differently was at 1 hour prior to testing myself (by this time I'd gone 3x) I only took 2 aspirin instead of 4 and took another 2 Tums (walmart brand). AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT FINALLY GOT A NEGATIVE on my test strip!! I'd heard about aspirin, but so many of the sites were saying it didn't work. As for the drinking bleach or vinegar I think not and it's very dangerous to do! Now I just hope that I've stored it in the freezer its going to continue to show negative, figured I'd test it again to be safe in a few days. I would just like to thank ChairmanMEOW for this information! I have already passed it along to many! OH So wish I'd found this long ago! All the detox products I've tried are like you said, BUNK! And besides that expensive!
SO Thanks again! Good Luck to those who are willing to give it a go!

Edited by Nunya68, July 18 2013 - 02:40 PM.
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#24 Nunya68

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Posted July 18 2013 - 02:41 PM

Oh yeah also at 1 hour prior I took a B Multi-Vitamin to make my urine more yellow!

#25 eatlysergicacid

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Posted July 18 2013 - 02:44 PM

OK I've been a smoker for a long time (30+ years) and have to take tests once in awhile to get my medications. I have tried everything under the sun and NOTHING worked. Saw this on the aspirin and thought what the heck. I've refrained for 50 days (only weigh 100 lbs soaking wet) and still showing up +! I usually clean myself once a year and freeze it so when the time comes I have MY OWN CLEAN URINE! But at day 50 still showing positive I was really getting bummed out and would like to have a toke! SO last night I found the info here and tried it. THE only thing I did differently was at 1 hour prior to testing myself (by this time I'd gone 3x) I only took 2 aspirin instead of 4 and took another 2 Tums (walmart brand). AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT FINALLY GOT A NEGATIVE on my test strip!! I'd heard about aspirin, but so many of the sites were saying it didn't work. As for the drinking bleach or vinegar I think not and it's very dangerous to do! Now I just hope that I've stored it in the freezer its going to continue to show negative, figured I'd test it again to be safe in a few days. I would just like to thank ChairmanMEOW for this information! I have already passed it along to many! OH So wish I'd found this long ago! All the detox products I've tried are like you said, BUNK! And besides that expensive!
SO Thanks again! Good Luck to those who are willing to give it a go!


Look up Quick Fix synthetic urine.
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#26 Nunya68

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Posted July 18 2013 - 02:47 PM

Thanks!

#27 Nunya68

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Posted July 18 2013 - 02:49 PM

I've heard and read the powdered form is best, but I don't know anyone that's tried it. Know many that have used JAZZ (detox drink) or the one with the volcanic ash and it's worked for them, but I ALWAYS seem to be the exception to every rule and none of it worked on me! So I was truly shocked when the aspirin trick worked! You can only guess what I'll be doing tonight :)

#28 nomiomi

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Posted December 21 2013 - 12:14 PM

Im on probation I smoke weed every once in a while I smoked 4x in a row. And only smoke not very often when in pribation stay high when not on probation how long will it take to get out of my system so I can go to probation and test clean

#29 nomiomi

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Posted December 21 2013 - 12:22 PM

Ok my thing is right now I'm on probation. When I'm not I stay smoking weed. So I can't smoke like I want right now. But I smoke everyonce in a while on probation. How long does thc stay in ur system if u don't smoke alot? I smoked 4x in 4 days. I weigh 226 & I'm 5'5" tall

#30 SpENS93

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Posted December 22 2013 - 10:40 AM

how about u just dont use drugs? that method is not fool proof and if your test is lab tested they can tell you are trying to defraud the test