I dont mean in the 'oh, I hate her sometimes, but shes still my sister' sense. I feel nothing but animosity towards her. Ill spare you the details of our family relationship because i doubt anyone cares. I can understand hating a parent, but older siblings are supposed to be there for you. Theyre supposed to relate to you and offer help during the shitty periods in life. My sister has never done anything but alienate me from my family, make me terrified of social situations, and instill an unquenchable rage in me that I am scared will one day manifest in violence. Im just wondering if anyone else feels this way towards a sibling.
I'd suggest putting some distance between you and your sister.. for a while at least. Learn to stand on your own two feet ... you're 21 after all. How do you expect her to be nice to you when you have such animosity towards her? She is her own person, ... and so are you.
Im actually not looking for advice, I was wondering if anyone else could relate. I have never expected her to be nice, thats my point. I dont see why you think Im dependent on her, I feel no connection to her whatsoever.
Why post then?? My sister is a me me But hey isn't my whole family. whereas i'm not so materialistic and everyone else is and they look down on me like eww that? So who cares at least i'm living . They have the attitude "I have this house, I have that car, I have that couch set, I have that bedding, so who cares, does everything have to match no so shut the hell up and myofb. If they don't like who you are or you don't like who they are theres boundaries use that
So your sister doesn't meet the high expectations you have of her, you're angry about it and are blaming her for everything. That's the way i read it anyway.
I hate my brother. To this very day. He treated me like shit my whole childhood, and now he wants me to forgive him. Yea right. . . Yea, sometimes it's not something you "grow out of". I've been away from my brother for awhile now, and I still don't like him.
Obviously you dont know where Im coming from. I dont have high expectations for my sister, I dont know where you got that. I expected her to beat my ass every day until I was ten, and bigger than her. I expected her to flip out every time my family went into public, and end the night in a fight. I expected her to try repeatedly to fight my dad, and him restraining her on the floor while I just sat there. I expected her to treat my mom like a doormat, and manipulate her into getting what she wanted, being a bitch to the whole family even when they where doing nice things for her. I expected her to threaten me when my parents werent around, make me afraid of going home. I dont really care anymore its the past. But when shes around I cant sleep, I cant really function, because here presence itself disturbs me. So if you cant relate, maybe this thread isnt for you.
I know where you're coming from. I have a sister that is poison! In fact, she may have even killed or at least let her husband die. The day before she told my father that she wished he was dead. Karma is a bitch. She treats her friends like gold, but she will stoop to any level to fuck up a family member. No one trusts her anymore. I e-mail her seldomly and only see her at funerals and weddings...shit like that. For me, keeping that distance between us is all that keeps me from wanting to beat her with an ax handle. Are you able to keep some distance between you and your sis?
GigoloAunt .... It may seem a bit harsh and blunt, and even negative of me, but there are always AT LEAST two sides to every story, and i'm simply attempting to point out just one ... that what we percieve in a situation isn't always the whole truth of it. People need to try and see the bigger picture and understand it, because it's usually through understanding that we can forgive our 'nasty relatives' and let go of our grievances towards them. They're just people like you and i and norcaligreenfiend, so part of my comments are in defence of them ... those 'nasty relatives' who don't have a voice in this thread to give their side of the story.
yeah my brother use to do this to me when i was 6 then i thought to myself hey maybe hes just trying to tell me GET YOUR OWN LIFE!
This is exactly how I feel about my sister. Minus the axe handle thing. I would think it, just wouldn't say it or type it. Around her friends, she is a saint, around family, she is a psychotic bitch.
i dont hate my sister, but sometimes i really dislike her, not coz shes a psycho just because shes an ungrateful little cow and would never go out of her way for anyone, not just her family. shes a selfish git really.
i guess i'm passive aggressive i don't see the point in giving in to any feelings of hate. if i dislike somebody rather i am probably nicer or at least nonchalant. why should i give idiots the satisfaction of a reaction when i can't even justify any amount of real thought about them.
For some people at least, siblings can just be people you see at weddings and funerals. The twain doesn't always meet between friends and family.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE ! I have two older sisters , My oldest sister my relationship with her IS GREAT , we have the typical relationship. Like I have soo much love & respect for her. But , oh my goodness, My 2nd oldest sister is so rude to me. And I have NEVER understood why , every since we were little it's been like that. Her friends have made fun of me & she never took up for me. She has never had my back. It's like she has this anger towards me for no apparent reason. And my mom & I have never seen eye-to-eye and so every time , she used to do unnecessary rude things to me , she never got in trouble. She's very manipulative and only sees stuff in her way and for her benefit. Like some days , I've thought we were plain cool with each other , but then I came to discover she just wanted information , money , etc out of me. And it hurts so much . I love people to the maximum ,even when I'm done wrong and I get sh-t delivered back to me.. I think my heart is too big & my tolerance level also. My thing for you to do is : Keep your distance unless it's required and just love her past her rudeness. That's what I do. We have LESS controversy with each other. But it will make you feel like a doormat , but that's how you have to be in life sometimes..
I have not spoken to my sister in over twenty-five years. It's more her doing than mine. It's the result of financial problems. Our father died fourteen years ago, and she got along better with him than I did, she did not attend the funeral. Our mother is ninety-seven, and not doing well. The sad thing is, we are the only ones left.
I have three sisters, and I don't need them in my life. I have MY family, and so long as WE are tight, it don't matter. Just because your born to the same parents, don't mean you have to be best buddies. Saying that, I hope my kids always like each other, but I think it depends how your parents treated you..