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Have a good comeback for "You have a small penis"


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#1 cumback_kid

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Posted March 12 2008 - 07:16 PM

People at school keep calling me "small penis" or "little weiner" or "jellybean" or "tic tac". It was funny for a little, but not any more. I am looking for a short but sweet comeback for this.

#2 Don Juan

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Posted March 12 2008 - 09:20 PM

How about we throw in a 'yo mum' insult in?
"well, it satisfies your mum". Eh, I'm no good at insults.

I guess beating them up is another alternative.

#3 Allonym

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Posted March 12 2008 - 09:58 PM

"why are you so interested in my penis size?"

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#4 ESRUOS ENO

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Posted March 12 2008 - 10:04 PM

Why dont you wippit out and say "SUCK MY MOTHER FUCKING DICK"!

#5 gesone

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Posted March 13 2008 - 06:50 AM

My advice is: fuck a comeback. if you are really fed up, kick his ass. that way you might get some respect, and if not, at least you'll feel better knowing you beat him to a pulp.

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#6 Popularity

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Posted May 04 2008 - 03:15 PM

Or: it's bigger than your brain.

that's terrible. he would get teased more.

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#7 GLENGLEN

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Posted May 05 2008 - 12:45 AM

Many A Better Man Than You Has "Gagged " On It.......Posted Image



Cheers Glen...Posted Image


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#8 kitkat

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Posted May 05 2008 - 06:07 AM

Well, if it was me, I would tell him his momma choked on it last night. But then I would make sure I knew I could take him down before I said it that way I knew I wouldn't get my ass kicked and possibly humiliated more.But, that's just what I would do.

#9 emelia

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Posted May 05 2008 - 10:11 AM

I would just say (if I was a guy of course) that 'it's not small, it just looks like it compared to your giant vagina'

Then that would only work if she was a girl...

:iamwithstupid:

:iagree:
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#10 cfs

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Posted May 08 2008 - 02:13 PM

I would just say (if I was a guy of course) that 'it's not small, it just looks like it compared to your giant vagina'

^^ to a girl or guy that one is hilarious!

and are some of you seriously encouraging him to start shit over this... ? i kinda thought he was looking for a funny comeback, not a fight. you gotta be better than that. if you're really going to fight smeone for this it will just make you out to be the asshole who is sensitive about his tiny penis

#11 emelia

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Posted May 08 2008 - 02:40 PM

^^ to a girl or guy that one is hilarious!

and are some of you seriously encouraging him to start shit over this... ? i kinda thought he was looking for a funny comeback, not a fight. you gotta be better than that. if you're really going to fight smeone for this it will just make you out to be the asshole who is sensitive about his tiny penis

:H

:iamwithstupid:

:iagree:
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#12 Zajko

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Posted May 09 2008 - 05:14 PM

In my experience, the best way to deal with such things is to play along with the joke and have the last laugh. After all, if it is such a big joke then it can't be true - at least not in any sense damaging to your self-esteem and confidence!

So the next time someone comments on your penis size, say: "Ah, but you will never know the delights of having sex with sea-monkeys!"

- or -

Make a point of carrying a magnifying glass and tweezers when you go into the men's room.

- or -

Show off a piece of fine embroidery and say: "I made this with my dick; it turns out it's just the right size for an embroidery needle!"

Anyway, you get the idea - one who can laugh at oneself is immune to the jests of others.

#13 does2

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Posted May 09 2008 - 05:22 PM

if these guys are talking about your penis size, then your best defense would be:

how do they know how big it is? where they choking on it, or are they just gay and were pater gazing in the bathroom?
did one of their mom's casually bring is up at breakfast whilst eating a sausage?
idk dude, fuck those guys, for the most part
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#14 bustramp

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Posted May 09 2008 - 05:40 PM

Just say "Suck on it, it gets bigger!"

#15 Song Breeze

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Posted May 12 2008 - 06:27 AM

"Suck it and see"
"Makes more girls cum than yours"

#16 Flamenco

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Posted May 15 2008 - 11:21 PM

have they ever called you Rosebud?
WtF?!

#17 D_MAN

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Posted May 15 2008 - 11:26 PM

In my experience, the best way to deal with such things is to play along with the joke and have the last laugh. After all, if it is such a big joke then it can't be true - at least not in any sense damaging to your self-esteem and confidence!

So the next time someone comments on your penis size, say: "Ah, but you will never know the delights of having sex with sea-monkeys!"

- or -

Make a point of carrying a magnifying glass and tweezers when you go into the men's room.

- or -

Show off a piece of fine embroidery and say: "I made this with my dick; it turns out it's just the right size for an embroidery needle!"

Anyway, you get the idea - one who can laugh at oneself is immune to the jests of others.


haha, this is good. Yea definitely don't let anyone laugh without you!
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#18 Nemba

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Posted May 17 2008 - 06:46 PM

Just straight up confident denial/disagreement. "Uh nah not really ay, 7 and a half's not too bad."

Whoever said to hit them, please don't say that. It's debatable whether violence is justified even for self defense, let well alone some idiot calling you names. Respect earned by fighting isn't worth it.

#19 deadhead82

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Posted May 20 2008 - 01:10 PM

have they ever called you Rosebud?


Hahahah rosebud.. that is fuckin funny
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#20 gaum

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Posted May 20 2008 - 04:52 PM

mabe you should grow a bigger penis?
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#21 ladyred222

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Posted May 29 2008 - 05:51 PM

My penis isn't small its all in the way you work it...... Now come on guys you know you have said it...:D
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#22 mystical_shroom

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Posted May 30 2008 - 05:23 AM

People are still doing that "small penis" insult... not very creative..

Just say "yeah"
or "yeah and..."
or "yeah, and your point being.."
Or just say "it sure is!"

When I get insulted (non creatively) I just say yeah, it not only stumps them but then they realize how lame their attempt at an insult was and feel stupid...

#23 ~Baked Goods~

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Posted May 30 2008 - 10:06 AM

In response, "Why are you worried about my dick when you should be suckin' on DEEZ NUTS!"

I've got a deez nuts comeback for everything
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That boy's got a whole head full of crazy.

#24 Rael

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Posted June 25 2008 - 02:12 AM

What happened to the jewish man with an erection who ran into a wall?

























































He broke his nose.
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#25 orison319

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Posted June 25 2008 - 02:37 AM

People are still doing that "small penis" insult... not very creative..

Just say "yeah"
or "yeah and..."
or "yeah, and your point being.."
Or just say "it sure is!"

When I get insulted (non creatively) I just say yeah, it not only stumps them but then they realize how lame their attempt at an insult was and feel stupid...

I say Oh yeah, but look at these NUTS...
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#26 Captain Cannabis

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Posted June 25 2008 - 09:16 AM

A couple kids wrote a song about my friend called "Josh has a baby dick"

Then one day when my other friend was making fun of him and then Josh whipped it out and said "Does that look like a babies dick to you" Everyone died laughing, then I yelled I can't tell move your pinky!

Even he laughed after I said that.

#27 MisterMorningGlory

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Posted July 09 2008 - 06:14 PM

dude thats not cool, sometimes you have to take a stand, you're allowed to get into a fight or two in highschool, its not gonna make you a bad person

#28 ZippyMischief

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Posted July 30 2008 - 12:08 PM

Depending on your age, its good to turn it against the woman in someone elses life - a mom, a girlfriend, a sister. Especially if that person is hot.

Just relay a certain enjoyment by the female. It can be as light or intense and disgusting as you want. But, intense and disgusting can yield greater results.

#29 trainwreck530

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Posted July 30 2008 - 12:31 PM

"wut bitch u want me 2 get it hard u fuckin queer! quit checkin my chickkin 4 i do go-go gadget dirk diggler on ur ass BDB mf! big dick boner!...then no ones safe, keep ur girl @ home 4 shes swingin on my johnson ya scrampton. from wut i hear u aint takin care of business,,sooner or later it all comes down 2 can u provide a stff cock..sounds to me like u got a bad case of limpdickitis,,no worries a$$hole just watch barney does michael jackson vol. 6"

lol i would probably say something like that if i was in school. or maybe this grinchy green has just me phukkn grifted. best of luck lol

..::~peace~::.. donny
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#30 xexon

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Posted July 30 2008 - 05:06 PM

"My penis may be small, but at least it has more of an ability to grow than your small mind."

There. That oughta work. :)


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