Boyfriends Health is freaking me out...something is wrong?!!

OK my boyfriend and I have been together for 10 months....and almost ever since we have been together he has had these horrid pains in his chest and left side of his torso. He said he had had them off and on for about a year or so...but he hates doctors...I don't even know if he has ever had a full exam in his life! He would spend the nite and wake up having trouble breathing and in excruciating pain...one time he even collapsed on my floor!! And starting coughing blood!!! OK...trouble breathing, chest pain and throwing, spitting, and coughing blood...hmmmm to me it doesn't sound normal. Sometimes it happens when he is angry sometimes it comes outta nowhere. He is driving me crazy insisting on the fact that "he" thinks everything is fine. To me ITS DEFINITLY NOT FINE! To me this is NOT normal! Then someone freaked me out and said..."it could be tuberculosis or hepatitis or something"! I begged him to go to the doctor and he kept giving me excuses like he doesnt have money, yet he was spending his money on all kinds of things...finally he said he would go...but woulndt let me go with him, which I found a bit odd. He supposedly went and said he explained his symptoms, didnt tell me what the doctor did...but said "oh she said its just stress". WHAT THE HELL?! Ok how many of you cough up blood and feel like your gonna die when you get stressed...not me! I feel like hes lying and didnt go to the doc or didnt tell the doc what was wrong....and now he is getting nosebleeds and horrid headaches as well. Geez...sorry if this is long but I am at my wits end...for one I dont want anything happening to him and I definitly dont want to get it if its contagious! Can anyone help or give advice...it will be much appreciated .....

 

Coughing up blood can mean a variety of things. It could be that he is bleeding somewhere in his respiratory tract between his nose and the bottom of his lungs. If the blood is due to violent coughing episodes, he may have a ruptured blood vessel in his lung. Sometimes blood can signal a viral infection. However, none of these would signify torso pain. Either he never really went to see a doctor, but merely told you this to calm down your fears....or..... he has an illness that he is unwilling to admit, which can possibly pose a risk to your health. You have a few options. You can either sit him down and speak with him. Discuss your concern for his health and well being. Or, you could speak to one of his family members (which will probably upset him). However, if he is having health issues and refuses to seek medical help, then getting his family involved may actually be beneficial. Better to be safe than sorry.

 

Yea thats another thing..his family and friends have no idea. Also...he doesnt have violent coughing so much...he will have the pain...so bad that he collapses or lies in a fetal position....then a few mild coughes with blood...but its not really phlem...just bood. If he knew he would endanger me then why wouldnt he get help...after these episodes he just insists hes fine..it drives me nuts.

 

It sounds like you already know he is not 'just fine' -he really ought to see a doctor, and for real this time; he either went to the local quack or he didn't go at all.

Some diseases, especially those that come with coughing and coughing up blood, can be quite infectous so that is an important reason to get him to go, too... some forms of tuberculosis are nasty, a grocery store worker here in the Netherlands had it recently and almost 30,000 people needed to be tested for the disease, 360 were infected (not actually ill yet -incubation period can be very, very long) and have to take meds now... I can understand being afraid of doctors, I sure don't like them myself and I often worry when I feel something strange.. Getting a serious disease is also one of my greatest fears... but when coughing up blood and all it's too important not to get tested by a *good* doctor. And lots of diseases *can* be cured nowadays -and the sooner you get started, the better the chances.

 

Well tell him your going out and that its a suprise where your going... And take him to a doctor.... He needs medical attention...

 

I'd get him to an ER immediately. Bullshit, no doctor is gonna tell someone they are coughing up blood due to "stress." He either didn't really go, or he didn't tell the doctor everything which was going on.

It could be TB, or a resp infection, or severe GERD or an ulcer or cancer or heaven knows what. He NEEDS to be taken to a hospital for a complete work up.

He said he saw a doctor. If he really did, a LOT blood work would have been done with his symptoms. Ask to see the results. If he says no blood work was done, he never saw any doctor.