This is my advice/opinion about on-line relationship advice. What you can really understand from someone's post is limited. We don't know about you. We don't know about your bf/gf. We are only getting your side. Also, you don't know much about us. We may have lousy advice (I may be no exception). i think sometimes people post on relationship forums as a way to deal with their own bitterness about a relationship that's gone bad. Attacking your significant other and recommneding that you break up is a way of venting their own hostility toward their own ex. Not surprisingly, the most aggressive dump advice comes from same-gender posters. Here is an example which I think demonstrates the situation. ---- (typical post) My girlfriend and I have been together now for three years. I have to say that they have been the happiest three years of my life. She feels the same way, and often tells me what a blessing it is to her to have me in her life. All of our friends say they have never seen two people happier and more in love with each other. We tell each other that we love each other often, and we've been thinking about getting married and having kids. We had a disagreement lately though. While both of us like the colors red and blue, I much prefer red, whereas she prefers the color blue. What should I do? Should I dump her? (typical response) Fuck the bitch! She's a whore! Throw her stank-ass whore bitch slut ass out now, or you obviously have no self-esteem! You can do better than her! Man, I feel sorry for you, you're pathetic. If you had any self-respect you would have thrown her out a long time ago. Now go bang the hell out her best friend, her sister, her worst enemy and her mom and post video on-line. That'll show her! ------- The responses to girls about their boyfriends are no more charitable. There are, unfortunately, a lot of people who want to tear down relationships because it suits their own agenda, and this is perhaps the core reason why gender relations are as poor as they are today. It pains me to think that fundamentally good relationships get thrown away over simple failures to communicate and work out problems. Worse, that a relationship gets trashed because a naive poster has been persuaded by a band of torch-bearing on-line relationship advice vigilantees. Please, take everything with a grain of salt! All relationships run into trouble sooner or later. The ones that survive tend to be ones where both parties have the communication skills, the patients, the willingness to understand and listen, the good will, and the willingness to apply effort to resolving conflict. If you can't solve problems in a relationship, all of your relationships will eventually fail. I'm all for dumping a sig. other if things are beyond repair, and certainly sticking with a bad relationship is a problem too. But there is something to be said for resolving problems even when you intend to break up. For one, you get experience with conflict resolution. You can leave with good memories. The same unresloved conflict may jump up in your next relationship. The anger and biterness from your past relationships can easily poison your future ones.
Agreed. One of the hardest things is to list OUR mistakes. Almost always biased in favor of the poster. Be aware, kids.
Well, since advice comes from experience, what more can one expect? Dr. Phil popping out of the closet? If all else fails, offer them a money back guarantee....
