Difficulty making guy cum through oral

Discussion in 'Oral Sex' started by KumquatGarden, Jul 25, 2014.

  1. KumquatGarden

    KumquatGarden Members

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    My bf is in his mid 20's with no erectile disorders. He is very experienced with women, and also masturbates/watches porn a lot. When we have penetrative sex, he has no problem cumming, but is also great at controlling his orgasms and can last a long time, or cum quickly, depending on the scenario.

    I give him oral pretty much every time we have sex, have only made him cum twice in this way- and both times it was on the same day. I was being so vigorous that at the end my eyes and nose were streaming, I usually blow him for 5 mins or so and then he either takes over with his hand while I suck his balls/rim him, or he will simply change positions so that we start having vaginal sex.

    Since he is VERY into porn and masturbation, I have wondered whether his body is just highly trained to only be able to cum with certain touches.

    I've also thought perhaps since he is the first man I've been with, I just don't have the oral skills. He has complimented me before on my head-giving though I kinda suspect that was more like encouragement since he knew of my inexperience.

    also, I am guilty of only blowing him when we are having full on sex (i know...I plan to remedy this soon ;) ). Sex often starts by me giving him head. So perhaps he simply doesn't want to cum too soon before we get to penetrative sex, or cum before he gets to pleasure me. (He is pretty thoughtful when it comes to making sure I get off too).

    any thoughts?
     
  2. birsha

    birsha Member

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    Obviously you should talk to your boyfriend to know for sure what the issue is.

    However, my boyfriend is similar to yours in that he doesn't come very easily from blow jobs. I can work on him for a good 15 minutes or longer without him coming. He loves it, or says he does but it just doesn't get him there when I'm just doing regular blow job kinds of things.

    Don't know if it's a porn thing or not but he does watch porn like your boyfriend and I imagine he does masturbate a lot too. I mean, I masturbate a lot myself. :)

    I'm guessing that the from your description of the times you did make him cum that he was maybe sort of fucking your face those times?

    That's basically the only way my boyfriend can get off that way too. It takes some pretty vigorous throat fucking for him to get there. But after I've warmed him up and then he goes to town that's the only reliable way I've found.

    It's a little tough to get used to but being face fucked really get's pretty easy with enough practice. You just have to be OK with lots of tears running down your cheeks and all the rest.

    So yeah, I feel you, and that's what works for me.
     
  3. NikeGirl

    NikeGirl Member

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    You got to suck him long and hard. It takes some work to get a guy to cum in your mouth, but it is well worth the effort.
     
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  4. hifonics

    hifonics Guest

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    You have to get the rhythm correct, some guys like it fast and hard others like it slow. Find out what he likes. A bj does not do much for me anymore, and my wife can suck a golf ball through a garden hose but it still takes a lot to make me cum. Try playing with his nipples a little that always helps me out.
     
  5. KingWilly

    KingWilly Member

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    It's probably a combination of things as you mention. Especially if he can only cum once in a session then yes he probably doesn't want to cum as he wants to have sex with you as well and make things last. Now if you're saying you'll start off with oral, switch to sex & various positions but then can't finish him off with oral then it's probably more of a case of technique than anything.

    And don't take offence to that at all, figure it's probably like a guy going down on you, just a guy licking you down their feels good, but a guy needs to know what he's doing to make you cum from going down on you right? Same thing with guys for the most part. Just be open with him and tell him to you want to know what makes him feel really good and to let you know when you do something that really feels good so you can learn & focus more on that and bring him to cum. But don't put too much emphasis on it being about making him cum, cause that can add pressure and nothing can make a guy shrivel up or lose it like pressure. So be careful there.
     
  6. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    I've never had this problem I've never had a guy be in my mouth for more than five mins before cumming. U need to look at his dick just look at it from all angles get a good feel for it know it's alive and it has wants and desires. It's ur job to fulfill these desires and to know how. Move ur tongue around while it's in ur mouth tighten ur lips make eye contact tell him u want him to cum in ur mouth and when he does swallow every drop with gusto
     
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  7. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    Also u said u rim him and he still doesn't cum which I also do not understand what r u doing exactly?
     
  8. HornyO

    HornyO Guest

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    As a guy who also struggled to cum from blowjobs in past relationships. It's def a mix of reasons. I think one of the main things is to make sure he knows ur there to make him cum in ur mouth and ur enjoying it. The minute any previous girls have acted like they wanted me to hurry up and cum it totally spoiled the moment. The other thing is lots of girls think super fast sucking combined with a handjob speeds things up. For me anyway a girl who slowly sucks with a constant rhythm makes me cum far, far quicker with a much more intense orgasm.

    So in conclusion. Slow, soft and sloppy sucking while enjoying it till he cums. Soon ull have a guy who can hardly last 5 mins because he knows there's no rush.
     
  9. CC23

    CC23 Member

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    I think I can help a bit on this also. Like the poster above, I had a boyfriend for a couple of years and even though he was not my first, he was my first serious boyfriend (live in) and I guess over time I gave him A LOT of blowjobs...and he almost never came from them...until...

    ...I finally had a "blowjob" talk with him. We were just casually fooling around one lazy morning and I was playing with his cock but not really going anywhere and I started to ask him about what he liked that I did and so on...we got to blowjobs and I asked what I could do differently to make it better and he said it would be amazing if it lasted just a bit longer. We really started to talk about it and we realized we both were just not connecting (despite that my mouth was wrapped around him) during the act.

    I found out that I was sucking much too fast, and I wanted him to cum but I would get tired so I would go faster and faster but he didn't seem to respond to that (as in he didn't seem to get any closer to cumming). He told me that fast wasn't necessary so right there I started to practice going much slower and 2 things happened: I didn't get as tired, and we both enjoyed it more!

    I also learned more from experimentation really my technique wasn't quite up to par...I used to more or less "bob my mouth" on him, but he liked better to have hard fast intake by my mouth and slower/longer withdrawal. I also learned that if I kept the blowjob wetter that he liked it better.

    He learned from me that I was opposed to him finishing in my mouth. We apparently had a miscommunication on that one...we were watching an adult video and the guy came in the girl's mouth and I said "that's gross", and he thought I meant the act of the guy cumming in her mouth, but I was really talking about her opening her mouth/sticking out tongue in true pornstar fashion..that's not something that appealed to me...so we got that out of the way.

    So after we were done talking and I experimented with different speeds and ways of pleasuring him with my mouth, and me looking up at him from between his legs between licks and telling him that I was now going to suck him until he came in my mouth...well a few minutes later - HE DID!

    So I'm telling you while what that worked with my ex bf, I think you should talk to your bf and experiment on him and find out what he REALLY likes that makes you comfortable to last a while and just go for it!


    Over time I learned that sort of the more time I took, and made sure to establish a good rhythm, that the more he got into it.
     
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  10. vance2335

    vance2335 Banned

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    It should not take a lot of work.
     
  11. dark suger

    dark suger Dripping With Sin!

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    Some guys like sick shit and dirty talk maybe tell him that ur his cock slut and ur there to service his shaft make him feel like u love it. I truly enjoy sucking dick and I think that's why I get good results
     
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  12. juicelover

    juicelover Member

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    I used to have a hard time cumming in my wifes mouth..my first wife would blow me, but NOT! let me cum..I think it was a psychological thing with me..I was so used to 'holding out'..that it became imbedded in my mind..I could NOT! cum if blown..My second wife took it as a personal challenge..lol..after numerous blowjobs where I did NOT cum..lots of talk about what felt good for me..her mouth is now my 'happy place' for my dick..If she has been drinking AND smoking a couple..she is insatiable..If I go to touch my cock..she yells.."MINE!"..leave it ALONE!..which makes me hornier..and easier to cum.her blowjob skills have improved 1000% since we met..and now it is her favorite thing to do. She also sucks me until I am almost ready to blow..and I slide it in her pussy..she says thats how I get the Hardest..lol..So any way you look at it..its a win-win..
     
  13. NikeGirl

    NikeGirl Member

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    Some guys say they never cum from oral alone, but I take that as a challenge.
    Give me enough time and I can make any guy cum in my mouth.
     
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  14. juicelover

    juicelover Member

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    NikeGirl....maybe you should teach 'blowjob 101'...I like when girls accept a 'challenge'
     
  15. tinyclit

    tinyclit Member

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    I usually just remind him that I love swallowing cum and that I want him to fill my mouth with thick sweet cum so that I can enjoy swallowing it. That usually gets him cumming into my mouth fairly quickly. :)
     
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  16. Cherea

    Cherea Senior Member

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    It's hard to make me cum in any fashion, especialy oral as I might even prefer giving depending on how pretty the pussy is. But I think the guy above is on to something. The times I did blow a load in a girl's mouth without penetration they made it clear that they were there to pleasure me and didn't expect reciprocation that particular moment. And that my pleasure was their pleasure.

    I think otherwise I would've felt guilty or selfish.
     
  17. vance2335

    vance2335 Banned

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    Well I accept your challenge.
     

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